Chapter 40

As we were walking from our bais midrash after Maariv, as stated above, the young married man Yonah spoke with me about traveling to Meron during Chol HaMoed Pesach. When I heard this, I yearned and longed for it intensely. During Sukkos I had already merited to do so, even before my marriage, but during Pesach I had not yet merited it. How intensely my soul always pined to come there, for every time I come there I gain a true and eternal gain in the service of Hashem, the like of which there is none, and so forth—particularly during Pesach and Sefirah.

It is brought in the holy Zohar that one must make the festival pilgrimage also to Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai, may his merit shield us. I told him that I yearned and longed for this intensely, but that I did not yet have [the means] for Shabbos and Yom Tov, and certainly not for such a journey. He replied that he very much wished to be there, but no one wished to travel with him (for people did not wish to leave their homes during Yom Tov), and it was very difficult for him to travel alone. He would therefore pay my travel expenses so that I could journey with him. I said that I was ready and prepared to do so. We agreed that early in the morning, after the vasikin prayer, we would travel together by train. That night I had work to do at home—to prevail upon my wife to permit me to leave on the journey.

On Wednesday morning, the first day of Chol HaMoed, I prayed Shacharis at vasikin and ate the Yom Tov meal. I also took with me some matzah, several grapefruits, and several boiled eggs. I went to his room so that we might travel together, but he delayed so long that we missed the train and went to travel by Egged bus.

When we came near the Egged station, we saw that two lines of people were already standing as far as George Street, and that we would have to stand in the queue until we could board the bus (for during the festivals many people traveled to Tel Aviv, and so forth). We stood there for close to two hours before we were able to board. Many buses passed before our turn came, while behind us still more rows stood filled—“Ben Poras Yosef” [“Yosef is a fruitful son,” a conventional invocation against the evil eye]. We boarded the bus, and suffered from the crowding on it and also from women who sat opposite us, and so forth.

We traveled as far as Tel Aviv and alighted there. There too were lines of people, and we had to stand in a queue in order to board the bus to Haifa. We stood for a long time until we merited to board it. People also stared at us because we were traveling in our Yom Tov garments and shtreimels, things to which they were unaccustomed. In sum, I suffered greatly on this journey—from the crowding and loss of time, from weakness of heart and mind, from standing in the sun for a long time, and from having to press myself into the crowd. All of it, however, was worthwhile in order to merit reaching the holy tziyun [holy gravesite].

We then traveled by bus to Haifa, but arrived there so late that we could no longer catch the bus to Meron, for the bus to Tzfas by way of Akko had already departed. This caused us suffering, for we would have to wait until the following day; moreover, Shabbos was approaching and we had to return home, and so forth. We did not know how to take counsel within our own souls—whether to lodge in Haifa and travel to Meron by way of Akko the next day, or to travel to Tiberias and from Tiberias to Tzfas.

In sum, he yearned and longed to travel to Tiberias at once. We purchased tickets to Tiberias, traveled there, and arrived shortly before evening. We had already missed the bus to Tzfas and were compelled to remain overnight in Tiberias. In the meantime we met the attendant of the gravesite of Rabbi Meir Baal HaNess. He traveled there with us, and we remained there for a short while in prayer and petition and paid the attendant a little money. We also saw the conflagration and destruction there: the Arabs had burned the yeshivah’s new building, and so forth.

On the return journey we immersed in the sea, went back into the city, and entered the Bais Midrash de-Reisin. Although they were opponents, we nevertheless remained there throughout our stay, for during the days of Pesach we did not eat or drink with any person: we did not wish to mix [our food] with that of another—“one does not wish to mix with the other”—particularly while traveling. The young married man who traveled with me had brought boiled water and other provisions with him, and he ate and drank. I, however, would not eat even from his food because it was Pesach, and thus I ate a dry meal.

While we were eating, people stood about and scorned and mocked us. Some disputed with us over our having traveled away from home during Pesach, particularly from Jerusalem, and so forth. Granted, they said, it is worthwhile to travel for the sake of money; but travel for spirituality they could not understand at all. For “the world” regards journeys undertaken for spirituality as something exceedingly strange. Merely to earn money, however, it is worthwhile to travel even to Gehinnom, even upon the double uncertainty that perhaps one might profit, and even to surrender one’s life through repeated acts of self-sacrifice for it; but to travel for the service of Hashem and to the graves of tzaddikim—this is madness.

According to the words of Rabbainu, of blessed memory, however, the reverse is true. If a person travels for livelihood and material concerns, this constitutes a blemish of the craving for money and a deficiency of trust, for he must trust and believe in Hashem, blessed be He, that He will provide his livelihood and needs even in his own city. All journeys should be specifically for spirituality and for the ultimate purpose. Even when an unavoidable journey presents itself and one is compelled to travel, one should think that perhaps some assistance in the service of Hashem will be occasioned for him there. For all a person’s thoughts, affairs, and meditations must be directed solely toward the eternal purpose; even his material affairs must likewise be for the sake of spirituality, so that through them he will be able to serve Hashem, blessed be He, and so forth.

They asked us where we would lodge and whether we would go to the hachnasas orchim [guesthouse], but we wished only to sleep there in the bais midrash. They agreed, provided that we watch over the bais midrash. We slept on the benches. Early in the morning we prayed in the bais midrash of the Karlin chasidim and were called up there to the Torah. Afterward we went further to the holy sites and immersed in the sea; we then went to the bus for Tzfas. We came to the bus and waited there, while in the meantime he went about his business, for he had money to collect from certain shops.

Afterward we traveled by bus to Tzfas. Upon arriving there, we went to the cemetery, to the grave of the Ari, of blessed memory, and so forth. We then traveled to Meron and entered the courtyard. Coming toward us was the Sephardic sage Chacham Aharon, who of late had been dwelling there alone for nearly the entire year, studying and serving Hashem, and so forth.

He was one of our chasidim and one of our acquaintances. He had been a Russian tailor, and had a friend among the soldiers there named Rabbi Avraham Getzi’s, who persuaded him that they should travel to Uman, to the tziyun of Rabbainu, of blessed memory. And so they did. They traveled to Mezhibuzh, to the grave of the Baal Shem Tov, of blessed memory, and from there traveled to Uman, to the tziyun of Rabbainu, of blessed memory, where they spent some time in the service of Hashem. (This Rabbi Avraham remained there permanently and married a daughter of Rabbi Getzi, one of the renowned, fervent members of our fellowship; he too was of the lineage of Rabbainu, of blessed memory. For his livelihood, he took charge of the mikveh and bathhouse in the courtyard of our bais midrash, kept it heated, and became the proprietor of the bathhouse.)

Afterward this Chacham Aharon came to Eretz Yisrael and worked for a time in construction, with mortar and bricks, in Haifa or Tzfas. Whenever he earned enough to sustain himself for several months, he would travel to Meron and remain there for several months, occupied with Torah and divine service, until the money was exhausted; he would then travel once more to work, and so forth. This had been his practice throughout all the years that he was in Eretz Yisrael. Many times he would also remain in Jerusalem for a period and serve Hashem at the Western Wall, and so forth.

Recently he had been in Meron continually, going to Tzfas once every two weeks. The people of Tzfas assisted with his livelihood so that he would not have to work and could remain in Meron occupied with Torah and divine service. In the years when it was impossible to travel to Meron, he would remain in Tzfas occupied with Torah and divine service, either in the old synagogue of the Ari, of blessed memory, or in the synagogue over the grave of Rabbi Banaah, known as HaTzadik HaLavan [the White Tzadik].

He rejoiced greatly at our arrival and greeted us with shalom aleichem, with a cheerful and gracious countenance, in love, affection, and fellowship. We arrived then—on Thursday—and also went to the mikveh. We entered the holy tziyun and recited the Tikun Haklali with awakening, together with the prayer of pidyon [redemption], the prayer for Lag BaOmer, other prayers, and hitbodedus [secluded personal prayer]. I conducted myself there according to my constant practice in Meron, engaging in hitbodedus, reciting the whole of Tehillim, and studying the books of Rabbainu, of blessed memory, and so forth. We prayed Minchah and Maariv.

Afterward we sat down to eat the evening meal. As on the preceding day, I ate dry matzah with several grapefruits, without drinking even a single drop of water. The young married man sat down to eat with Chacham Aharon, and they prepared a dish of potatoes, and so forth, together with other foods. They asked me as well to eat, and the aforementioned Chacham Aharon in particular urged me greatly, but to no avail: I would not partake at all because it was Pesach, as stated above. Throughout all three days I endured thirst and did not drink even a single drop of water, and so forth, although my stomach hurt and I was exceedingly weak from the wanderings, the crowding on the buses, and the jolting of the road.

Nevertheless, I endured everything and performed my service. Nearly the entire night I remained awake in yearning and longing, gazing and looking upon the holy tziyun, and engaging in hitbodedus in a whisper beneath the sheet. At midnight we arose and performed our service by reciting Tikun Chatzos (Tikun Leah alone, because it was Yom Tov), and we recited Tehillim and prayers, and so forth, and so forth, until daybreak. We then went to the mikveh in the courtyard, prayed early in the morning, and recited further prayers and petitions at the holy tziyun. (And we bade farewell to the holy tziyun.) We then took leave of the holy tziyun.

We set out to travel back to Jerusalem and came to the main road, where one could catch the bus traveling from Tzfas to Haifa by way of Akko. We stood there until the bus from Tzfas came by, boarded it, and traveled as far as Haifa; from there we traveled to Tel Aviv, and from there to Jerusalem. On this journey too we suffered from the crowding of people standing to board the buses, though not as severely as on our outward journey.

We arrived home on Friday, several hours before evening. We rejoiced greatly that we had merited to snatch such a gain in this world, particularly since it had come to us with difficulty, and “in accordance with the suffering is the reward.” The awakening also remained with me, as is my usual experience: for some time after returning from a journey to Meron, I possess an awakening in the service of Hashem; the taste of Meron still rests in my mind, and for a time I am an entirely different person, until it is forgotten and must be renewed once more. At any rate, I was a different person, filled with awakening, and was also happy that I had merited this. My joy was somewhat stilled, however, for upon my arrival home my wife, may she live, told me that she was weak and was spitting blood, and so forth. Blessed be Hashem that I have merited to reach this point.