Likutay Tefilos (Collection of Prayers)
[More regarding Likutay Tefilos] There is such a Likutay Tefilos - - in Tiberius, all the young men (youngerman -connotation of those who study all day in Kollel), all the misnagdim (-antagonists), they didn't want even to touch – a Likutay Tefilos?! Even til today! Until this very day! Likutay Tefilos?! What is this – they didn't institute for us any prayers?! In the morning, Mincha (-afternoon service), Maariv (-night service)?! Why (-what is there to) Likutay Tefilos?! Who else can say such Likutay Tefilos?!… Take a look epes (-something – we have here) a mishuganer (-crazy person), he says regularly Tefilos (-prayers)!… Or – hisbodidus! He goes in a room, or in a field, and he goes and has hisbodidus! And goes beseeching HY for parnasa (-livelihood)! And he goes beseeching HY! He does hisbodidus?! - By the world this is a bonafide craziness!… (*Likutay Halachos, Orach Chaim, Laws of Rosh Chodesh 5:15, brought down in Outpouring of the Soul, final section, article 6). * [Continuing regarding the Prayer Leader] The holy Rebbe (-in the capacity of the Prayer Leader of Story #12) goes about in the world, and also by us – as long as we are not privy to the power of the holy Rebbe'n – that this world is absolutely nothing, the main thing is only the tachlis, the main thing is just Torah and prayer – one can waste the (-his) years, make peace, and be a Breslover… However [one must be] such a Breslover – that the holy Rebbe tells over in the story of the Prayer Leader – that he spoke with the poor men, he spoke of the tachlis. When someone wanted to draw himself close (-Saba first uses the Yiddish word for bonding) to him, to bind (-then Saba uses the Hebrew word of divaikus) himself to him – he would immediately (him) – that is what is written – immediately he would take him to his place that he had outside of civilization! This infers that civilization with Rebbe'n – do not agree! They are not congruous!…. As long as we (we) don't know the pure truth, and one is a smart guy (-relies on his smarts), and one desires to be – one desires to have face (-presence, status, interaction) in this world, one desires to have money, one desires to have “yaishoos” (-substance, entity) – a “yaish” (-entity) in this world – as long as one does not run to the holy Rebbe'n, one does not give himself over to the holy Rebbe'n, as he taught us! - - He taught us the opposite from this world! Like the holy Rebbe speaks of this (Story of the Prayer Leader), that suddenly men went missing from the country, and it wasn't known where they were, by this one a son was missing, by this one a son-in-law was missing… and the Country of Wealth wondered – that there is found a man who speaks such things?! Who speaks such things against their faith, that money is absolutely nothing, just Torah and prayer! So they said that this must be the Prayer Leader!… And similarly the men of the King, the ten men of the King who went lost by (-at the time of) the storm wind, and they began seek and find each other, they saw, they searched each other out – here they found the Geebor (-mighty warrior), here they found this, here the Adviser, each time the group became bigger, they found each other. They saw that HY had mercy, that they found each other, once again they found each other. They were – this one here, this one there, and they didn't know one from the second, and they found each other! Another one, another one, another one, they found each other! So they said, that this is in the merit of the kosher Prayer Leader! Everyone, everyone said – the Prayer Leader! And he spoke with the Country of Wealth! Not the Geebor (-mighty warrior), and not anyone, just the Prayer Leader! * [Rabbi Nachman's Stories] And similarly, that which we see in the first story, what the holy Rebbe said, “On the way I told over a story, which whoever heard it had a thought of repentance!” This is the introduction, this is the first story, the beginning of all the stories, the introduction! This the holy Rebbe gives us to hear – whoever has ears, that every story – not just that story – in every story there are complete structures, there are many concepts, it goes out from this and goes into this, this is all – whoever hears this, has a thought of repentance! (*See more about this in the introduction to the Stories). This the holy Rebbe gives us to hear, that it isn't just to be read – one must inculcate it in the mind! One must look well at what is going on here! What is being said here! And similarly in every Torah (-holy teaching), and similarly in every prayer! *** From where did there become a R' Yisroel (Karduner)?! Not from the Torah and the prayers?! And this is (true) till today! It is not the way to say, “Once there was a R' Yisroel,” “Once the world was frum (-pious, devout, Heaven fearing),” “Today it is like this!” - - No!! It was once – and it “is”!! There was a R' Yisroel – and there is!! There was a Rebbe, there was a Prayer Leader - - by the Legendary Tales it is written, “Once there was a Prayer Leader,” however, the Prayer Leader was – and he is!!! And he deals with us! And he teaches us! And he takes care (/worries, concerned) of us! (*Life of Our Leader Rabbi Nachman, article 225, “And in the night before his passing away, he said, “What do you have to worry, being that I go before you, and what, if the souls that didn't know me at all, they await my rectifications, all the more so you etc.. And so too even those that didn't merit to know Rabbainu o.b.m. in his life, when they come to his holy tomb, and support themselves upon him (/it), and they learn his holy books, and they accustom themselves to go in his holy ways which are enumerated in his holy books, certainly they have what to rely upon, fortunate are they, fortunate is their lot, and they will not err all who take refuge in him, because he already revealed his volition in many expressions, explicitly and in hints, that everything he does with us isn't only for us, but for those that are here and those that are not here etc..) By the world this is mamash (-really) a Purim play – the Likutay Moharan, with Likutay Tefilos – if they see someone saying a lot of Likutay Tefilos and crying before Hashem Yisburach; - Nu nu, this is a coarse young… this is an ignoramus… he says so much Likutay Tefilos… Nu, I have actually seen precious souls, however, the way R' Yisroel said Likutay Tefilos – and the Shabbos that I saw by him, and the Succos, with the Shavuos, and the melodies, with the joy - - it was something unique in the world! He was “The work of My hands for glorification (Isaiah 60:21 – see earlier where Saba said that R' Shlomo Wexler said of R' Yisroel the verse 49:3)!” HY's handiwork! The work of Hashem! The finger of G-d (Exodus 8:15, and see Psalms 8:4 and the Malbim there, that “finger” denotes direct attribution to HY whereas hand can refer to what was brought about by His Will even indirectly)!!! *** I Won and Will Win We see how the truth is victorious! How much the world is far from Rebbe'n, from hisbodidus, Likutay Tefilos - - so we would need to be abnegated before the world! And if all the greats (“gedolim”), all the greats of the generation (“gedolay hador”) are distant from this, they laugh at this – we would need to be abnegated! - The more time passes by, we would need to desist! And in the end we see that the philosophers, the great men of the world, the men of science - - they needed to nullify the Rebbe completely! Because he was so much against learning wisdoms and languages, even of the greats of Israel that speak of chakeeroas (-philosophical questions and scientific research)! (*Life of Our Leader Rabbi Nachman, article 407). - They needed to decide amongst themselves that he has absolutely no part in any wisdoms and any intelligence, and even not to speak of him whatsoever! And in the end they were abnegated – after such words, after such a type of opposition that the holy Rebbe opposed them – they are abnegated! * (Speaking about a famous Israeli Politician whom Saba drew close to Rabbainu) He once told me, that once he entered amongst big professors, and they sat together and they spoke, they spoke about the holy Rebbe'n, and he came in and he heard how they say, “The Rebbe says like this.” He asked, “Who is the Rebbe?” One of them answered him – he was a big professor, a big philosopher, in short, he (the professor) said to him, “Do not mix in between us, you are an am hu'uretz (ignoramus), you know absolutely nothing! If you don't know that stam (-plain) “Rebbe” is the Rebbe Rabbi Nachman – you are an am hu'uretz (-ignoramus)!… And similarly – this is by them! And even by us, by the frum (-Heaven fearing, pious), the yeshivas – who speaks of the Litvisheh (-of the school of Lithuania, where the study of Talmud was favored over Chasidus) Yeshivas – there are great men, greats (-leaders) of the generation (“gedoalay hador”), who made books of mussar (-ethics). Nu, today they wonder, what is this?! Why epes (-all of the sudden) such a type of commotion?!… What is this?! Likutay Tefilos?! Hisbodidus?! The holy Rebbe said however, “I finished <gumartee> and I will finish <vu-egmor> (*Life of Our Leader Rabbi Nachman, article 229)!” - So they are nullified! They are nullified! They see epes (-somehow/something of) the finger of <etzba> Eloakim <G-d>! - Where does one get epes (-somehow, something) the money to print?! Where does one get (-the merit?) to sell the books?!… * - And I merited to see with my own eyes the power of truth! How R' Yisroel was victorious over the whole world! He had such a holy mind, that by him in (his) heart and in his mind it was by him something to laugh at – it had absolutely no value by him, no importance, the entire world! (*See The Days of Rabbi Nussun, volume 2, article 32, “Did not Rabbainu say that you laugh from the whole world etc..”). He didn't announce this – he didn't say that he is such and such! But by him, he knew what goes on epes (-something/somehow) in the world! And he saw – he felt this, that this will conquer the world! Even though we are now found in exile, to be mocked and scorned, however this is such a type of power that will win over the entire world! From R' Yisroel I received this – not that he told it to me, just that HY helped me to understand it, to recognize, one hundred percent, without any doubts! The more one believes in the holy Rebbe'n, and listens to him, and doesn't look at the world - - *** The Holiness of the Bris (circumcision) (Someone asks, “Did R' Yisroel speak about guarding the bris, from matters of holiness?”) What are you saying?! He spoke – with holiness and with purity, and by implication. And since it was in hints – it was set inside the heart! It was such a thing that it was – not open, just “concealed and revealed <susoom vigalya>,” with such a type of holiness and purity! One can become disheartened, when one knows that he is distant from this. His words were – from one side he let me know my shortcomings, the alienation, - and in this was included such a type of encouragement! Such! This is even stronger than when one speaks (outright). When one speaks in hints, it is stronger than when one speaks openly, it has a tremendous influence! The Rebbe said in the Legendary Tales, that the more something is hidden the greater power it has! (*Words of Rabbi Nachman, end of article 151, “He said regarding the Legendary Tales which he told over, that it would be better not to reveal of them any hint to what they allude to, because when the matter is hidden, it is possible to effect more with it of what is needed, however he is forced sometimes to reveal some miniscule hint (in the world) in order that it should be known that they contain hidden matters.”). He said that once in a while he says some hints of the stories from the verses, this is only in order to make known that this is not any plain (“stam”) story. Similarly with this as well, lihavdil (“to separate” - not to equate the two parallels), Heaven forbid – it isn't any example, but so it is – the holy Rebbe said that when it is concealed it has yet a greater strength! I remember that this shined (Heb: in me), I understood what he was saying. It was concealed – and it screamed with koalay koaloas (-calling of calls – thundering yelling and screaming)…. Behold this is the essential agenda of the Rebbe'n! You ask about such a thing which the entire enterprise is about?! The entire fundamental of Rebbe'ns concern is about this – we should merit to it! (*See Words of Rabbi Nachman, article 115, “The main test of every person in this world is in this desire etc..”). By the world, even by the frum (-Heaven fearing, devout) world, it is – if the Master of the World created the world like this, one needs to behave like this… the holy Rebbe said, in the story of the Prayer Leader, of the group that made the queen's daughter their king, they were already so consumed in the taava (-promiscuity), that it was by them like something permissible, that this is the way the world is! (*See more on this vein in Likutay Halachos, Laws of Prayer, which is based on this story, 4:5). Only the holy Rebbe – by him one learns how to be a Jew, how one must behave with holiness and with purity, and how one must beseech HY for this! And how one must have mesiras nefesh (-self sacrifice) for this! That one should merit to know, to have daas (-realization of knowledge), intelligence (“saichel”) - - this is a givaldig (-outstanding) wisdom, a givaldig (-outstanding) daas (-realization of knowledge), - that one should merit to this in this world, to live as one should. For example – I was a neighbor of R' Yisroel, I saw his life, I saw – it is not possible to relate – he had two rooms, a room in which they ate, and he slept there. And she had another room, and he never had anything to do with her room…. It wasn't such a life like the world lives – actually kosher, just what then, like this – one doesn't give heart (-pay attention). He lived a life of holiness and purity, with eating, with drinking, with praying, and with everything! And behold this is the main thing – the matter of guarding the bris (-circumcision), this is more than everything! (*See Life of Our Leader Rabbi Nachman. Article 601, “The main virtue (“maala,” height) of the tzaddik is according to his holiness in this desire etc..”). * Thank G-d – I merited to always be together with R' Yisroel'n, out of great love. I loved hearing every word, every second that I was with him, I had (sheer?) profit. It was an outpouring of bounty (“hashpu'u”/influence), a type of holy outpouring of bounty (/influence) to be there alone with him. I saw in what his mind was always set, one doesn't see such a thing in the world! Not for nothing did I – thank G-d (-said in Yiddish), thank G-d (-said in Hebrew), I didn't look at (-pay attention to) anyone! (Not even) At the biggest! I suffered everything, and I endured! How is it?! I saw such – the truth, such a type of truth! And by the world, even by the frum (-Heaven fearing, devout) world, chasidim, this is a craziness - - just the Future World?! Just the tachlis (-ultimate purpose, end)?!… And what about money?! And what about the world?! All the seventy years one must travel, search, so that one should find - - the holy Rebbe said this – that one must see such a man, such (*See Likutay Halachos, Laws of Messengers 5:6, that there is always someone or group that can loyally impart the holy ways of the true tzaddik). And HY helped me, I merited, out of truth, out of mesiras nefesh (-self sacrifice), out of such a type of lowliness, out of such a type of mockery and disgrace, (to/like) what is not at all possible to fathom in the mind! *** The Kloyz (Big synagogue in Uman near the holy tomb) I saw in The Days of Rabbi Nussun (volume 1, from article 107 onwards), how Rabbi Nussun saw that the more years passed from the Rebbe'ns passing away, the bigger the oalum (“world”- the crowd, the people). There was a place where to pray, in the city there was built some sort of new synagogue, and when they came on the pilgrimage of Rosh Hashana they (-the locals) requested them to pray in this synagogue, so they prayed there for some years. Every year there were more souls, so they couldn't fit inside this synagogue, so they had to rent. In any event, every time there were more, the more persecution (“chasing”) – the ever more (-people), as it is written (Exodus 1:7), “And the Children of Israel had offspring, and they multiplies, and they became increasingly bigger, and they became massive (/powerful) very very much (-see there verse 12, the more they were persecuted the more they grew),” the more they were persecuted (“chased”)…. One soul that draws close – is more than the whole world, than thousands, than thousands (*See Likutay Halachos, Laws of Procreation 5:11). One man that draws close to Rebbe'n is more – is a novelty in the world, it is such… And the holy Rebbe took his souls, such souls, such souls that stood up against the entire world! The Prayer Leader, they were a few men, the Prayer Leader with his few men, they were the world!… I heard from a few – R' Naftoli (Cohen), R' Shlomo (Wexler), R' Nussun Bittelmacher - - in the year 5595 (-1835) it was then when there was the great opposition, that they rose up, Heaven have mercy, to destroy, to kill, and to wipe out. It was in the year 5595 (-1835), and it continued that way till the year '98 (-1838), that is, three years. In '92 (-1832) Rabbi Nussun saw that every year the oalum (-the people) was bigger, and there was no where to pray, each time they prayed in a bigger place. And there was found someone, a wealthy man, who gave over a large place, and provided tables with water. In any event, Rabbi Nussun saw that they were transient – Rosh Hashana, so HY put inside his heart a desire, a strong will that he would build a synagogue! Nu, Rabbi Nussun had no money, and it was very remote to attain so much money – to buy a place and build a synagogue – where does one get this?! There were a few wealthy people, but these wealthy men; first of all – the need to merit, and further – it costs a lot of money, nu, a wealthy man, if he gives a nice donation it is very nice, however, that he should give over a portion of his wealth for such a synagogue?! In any event, Rabbi Nussun strengthened himself in this, and he merited, and he bought a place, and began to build, and the Master of the World performed epes (-somehow/something) supernatural miracles! When he bought the place, and began to build, he erected the pillars, there was a commotion, this was 5594 (1834). It started in '92 (-1832), '93, '94, and in '95 (-1835) there began such a type of opposition, '95 there was already the synagogue, the synagogue already stood. In the few years which the synagogue was built, there was by the misnagdim (-antagonists) such… there were such miracles. Because the misnagdim (they) wanted to stone Rabbi Nussun! What – he wants epes (somehow/something) to make such a type of thing?! Rosh Hashana by a tzion (-holy tomb)?! To come to a tzion (-holy tomb)?! The opposition on Breslov! - - - * - - - Oy oy oy. I see The Days of Rabbi Nussun, so apparently there already is here (a) The Days of Rabbi Nussun, there already is here a Likutay Tefilos, however, if one doesn't look at it – it is absolutely nothing, one thinks it is just some stories, why is it so necessary for me?! A story?! When one comes to read The Days of Rabbi Nussun, and one can read through it as if it were a story; there was a synagogue, it was crowded, this is a story! - No!! This is something that happened by Rebbe'ns matters, this is something else entirely, this is something such, such (“azellechez” - often Saba ended a sentence with this word which I have rendered plainly: “such” - as in so very much, and such a thing). HY had mercy on us and He gave the holy Rebbe'n such a disciple, Rabbi Nussun, all the disciples, however, such a Rabbi Nussun, this is greater than all of them, greater than all of them! Such. *** Bichu <in you> Rabbainu Nugeela <we will rejoice> The holy Rebbe speaks so much about joy, we still have not found the likes of such. In the Sichos (-The Words of Rabbi Nachman), in Sefer Hamidos (-Character – the Aleph Bet Book of the Traits), in Likutay Moharan – he speaks so much about joy! It really becomes apparent – that it refers and goes on him! All the joy and thanksgiving, and gratitude – that HY had mercy on us and gave us such a Rebbe'n! (*See Likutay Halachos, Laws of Shabbos 5:15). And we need to search, we need to search, it is here, we just need to search, it is here! “Of joy, what does it accomplish (Ecclesiastes 2:2)?!” Good, I believe in G-d, I believe in Torah, enough (-it is already sufficient)! The entire world also believes, they believe in Hashem! - - No!! The holy Rebbe speaks so much about joy, apparently one needs to be very joyous with the holy Rebbe! Bichu <in you> Rabbainu nugeela <we will rejoice>!… However we must be sincere, we must look with a different eye, with a truthful eye, we must search as much as necessary, we need to search, and we need not to despair! And similarly (with) everything, What kind of words from the holy Rebbe'n, in the Toaroas (-holy teachings), in the Sichos (-Words of Rabbi Nachman), in the stories (-Legendary Tales), everything is – wasn't made for anyone, just for us! For us, in every generation and generation, for every Jew, in every generation and generation! (*See Words of Rabbi Nachman, article 209, how the teachings of Rabbainu are for the future generations). When he says, “There is no despair in the world whatsoever.” (*Likutay Moharan, volume 2, Torah 78, “And he said in these words, 'Any despair is absolutely not in existence (-that is the closest to the Yiddish original I was able to afford, but the classic Hebrew version, which Saba used here at the beginning of the paragraph is as I rendered it there)', and he very much elongated these words 'any despair etc.' and said them with very great power and wondrous awesome depth, in order to teach and hint to each and every single one in the generations to come, that they should not despair in any way in the world, even if he undergoes whatever it is, and however he is, even if he fell to the place that he fell, may the Merciful One save us, since he strengthens himself with what he is (/slightly), he still has hope to repent and return to Him Blessed He.”). A few words, one time, two times, three times, enough! (-why is it necessary to repeat so much), “There is no despair in the world whatsoever!” But the “There is no despair in the world whatsoever” went out from Rebbe'n with such a type of “gevald” (-exclamation or outcry of emphasis), with such a type of “gevald”, to the expiration of the soul (-kiloas hanefesh) - “giva-a-ld!” He very much elongated with the word “gevald,” such. Afterwards his life almost left him – then he said, “[you] Do not despair,” “Any despair absolutely does not exist <there is no despair in the world whatsoever>!” (– See Life of Our Leader Rabbi Nachman, article 49, “At the time he said the Torah 'Vu-eschanan <And I supplicated>' which is printed in the second volume of Likutay Moharan, Torah 78, and there it speaks of the matter that it is forbidden to ever despair of oneself, however one may be, G-d forbid, he said then in these words, 'One must not despair of himself. “Givald” [you] do not despair', and he drew out the word 'givald' very much, in the way of someone who warns and screams from the depth of the heart.”) Nu, we already heard, not once, and I already knew of it! - No, no! This needs to be always new! And one must know that this all refers and goes on him, without him (-Rabbainu) – there is (yes) despair, with him – there is not any despair! He screamed, “Gevald,” we must know – when there is here such a Rebbe then already, “There is no despair in the world whatsoever!” The entire world knows “There is no despair in the world,” they take a few words and it is enough (/already:), exempt, already (/sufficiently) heard! What is there further?! - No! This is alluded to in the “gevald,” in the “there is no despair,” this refers to Rebbe'n, when one has him – then “there is no despair,” and when one does not have him – there is (yeah) despair! (*See Ullim Litrufa, Letter of Rabbi Nussun from Tuesday, Torah Portion of Tazreya 5600, “And in their inner hearts everyone is screaming with very great bitterness of soul on the their great alienation from the eternal tachlis, but they are like birds caught in a trap etc., and the great deluge of water of all the bodily desires and the vices, especially the ordeal of money and parnasa (-livelihood) etc. grow stronger all the time, and more than everything, the greatest calamity over all is what most of them are extremely forlorn in absolute despair, so that it is impossible for one to think of the tachlis properly, and it is impossible to uplift him for many reasons etc.. And now remember well the kindness of Hashem and His wonders which He did with us, because you still do not know the extent to which one needs to be strengthened, and like Admu”r (-Our Master, leader, and Rabbainu) o.b.m. screamed with a voice of depth and power, 'Givald (you) do not despair. Any despair is absolutely not in existence'. And the main thing is to strengthen in joy by all the ways that you heard. And Hashem will assist you, we will rejoice and be happy in His salvation.”) The world looks the way it does nebach (-pitifully, unfortunately), they don't have anyone to help them, they don't have anyone to schlep them out of the mud! And we see also - - when we give ourselves over to Rebbe'n, and the faith that we have in Rebbe'n – we are saved instantly! Immediately! This is the main thing, with this it is possible to be Jews, with this it is “ashrainoo <fortunate are we>!!!” And similarly every word of the holy Rebbe, and regarding joy, we see this in the writings, in Likutay Tefilos, in Likutay Moharan, that the main thing is – that we know of the holy Rebbe'n! One must see to it to know from him, one must seek him! The holy Rebbe himself, in Torah 8 (*Likutay Moharan, volume 2, 8:8), and also in other Torahs, says so himself, how one must seek the tzaddik, the tzaddik of the generation, the true tzaddik, how one must search for him. Nu, we see this again, and we see this again, and it is enough (/already) - - *** I Had Much Pleasure From Your Devotions I remember, I was drawn close in a time that there was such a type of hunger, I was with R' Yisroel (Karduner o.b.m.). When R' Yisroel would go to Meron, I would go with him to Meron. Nu, I was there in Meron, and it was some few days which we didn't have what to eat, not a piece of bread. So I thought that we must go into Tsfas (-Safed) among people, among Jews, so that we can have something, a piece of bread, let it be something, something sparing, something, here there is (decisively) absolutely nothing! Fine, so I said to R' Yisroel'n that we need to go into Tsfas, we cannot endure! I wanted that we should travel to Tsfas, I wanted a piece of bread. So he said to me, “Until three days, if absolutely nothing arrives he (Heb: we) will go,” Three days! Two days passed by. On the third day I already awaited that we would go to Tsfas, and there arrived three kilo of flour from R' Nussun Tirhavitzer (-a Breslover in Tsfas)…. * - - It is not possible to tell over even one word, You don't know what this means! One must put the (-his) ears and the (-his) heart, “good good” (-very well) to every word, to be able to merit to what is necessary! - And similarly to the Legendary Tales, and similarly to Likutay Moharan, this is the fundamental – this shines into us the light of the Torah! Without this everything is sealed (/blocked/hidden)! All our words are only for this, so that we learn out from them how we need to have the Rebbe'n. And this is here, here (Heb: all here)! Everything, everything, from the beginning to the end! This that I merited to see with my own eyes, what I saw by R' Yisroel'n, from this I became aware of something that the world does not know! Such things that I saw with my own eyes – which were entirely something else! Out of mesiras nefesh (-self sacrifice), out of such sorts of lowliness and such sorts of degradation which are not in the world! And that is how I merited to be slightly aware to know from Rebbe'n, epes (-something). I received from all of our men, from R' Shlomo (Wexler o.b.m.) - - I didn't sit (-live) in Jerusalem to be seen (-hangout) with them, I traveled! I made a trip with mesiras nefesh (-self sacrifice)! HY had mercy on me, that every time (that) I traveled, I received news, such precious - - However the foundation was R' Yisroel, without R' Yisroel'n I would not have merited to this, everything was through R' Yisroel'n! I was by R' Shlomo, and similarly by everyone, I traveled to receive from them. And HY had mercy on me, he administered such roundabouts that I merited to receive a lot from them. However, if I would not have known from R' Yisroel'n, there wouldn't have been anything at all, I would have had absolutely no affinity. He was the foundation, my heart, my heart! * And from this were made such things which are eternal, we have no conception. Now I see that the truth has such a type of power – I saw such a type of avoada (-devotion), such a type of truth, and I had meseeras nefesh (-self sacrifice), and I had battles with the whole world! And how I remained steadfast – all the hardships of the world transpired, besides for the opposition there were more hardships, there was hunger – it was engulfing from all sides! And in this way it was hidden - - Nu, when it happens, one doesn't realize, however, now I see that from the onset when I drew close to Rebbe'n, how there were orchestrated factors, wonders, so that I will be entirely something else! (So) I should have such words which will illuminate the world! And this letter (*”The Petek” - The story of this wondrous letter in short, as Saba told it over elsewhere; it was a few years after the passing of his mentor R' Yisroel Karduner o.b.m., on the fast day of the 17th of Tamuz in the year 5682 (-1922), after his devotions from midnight till the morning as was his way, he felt weak and sickly and decided that it was necessary for him to break the fast, immediately afterwards he realized that it had been unnecessary, and he was struck down with tremendous depression for having eaten, and he couldn't find anything to uplift himself (and this was on top of his regular regimen of dire hardships and opposition etc..) For several days he lay immobile on a bench in the synagogue of Rabbi Meir Bal Hanais, it was frightful even to see him. Finally Saba said to HY, it is true that I did something wrong, but I want to repent! What is this depression?! This can cause a desecration of Hashem, people will say that this is the end of all the Breslovers etc. etc.. As he lay there he had a strong notion in his head, almost as if there was a voice inside telling him to go to his room, to his locker, and open a holy book, and there he will find a cure. So he schlepped himself over, and opened up a volume of Likutay Halachos, there was a paper there which he didn't pay attention to, figuring that it was a bookmark, he read a little from the holy book and got a little encouragement, but it wasn't enough, and now he was filled with even more despair, before shutting the book he took a look at the paper, and as he read it he was filled with so much joy, as much as he had been depressed the more he was imbued with happiness and hope. This is what the note said: “Very hard it was for me to descend to you\ my precious student to tell you that I enjoyed\ greatly your service and upon you I said\ my fire will burn until the\ Messiah will come be strong and courageous\ in your service\ Na NaCh NaChMu NaChMuN MeyUMaN\ and with this I shall reveal to you a secret and it is\ full and heaped up from end to end (PTzPTzYH)\ and with strengthening of service you will understand it and a sign\ the 17th of Tamuz they will say that you are not fasting.” Saba proceeded to dance away most of the night, and was forever inspired and encouraged by the Petek to reach the highest devotion, loyalty, and nullification to HY. After sixty years, Saba understood that the time had come to fully exploit the power of the Petek to help bring the world to the Divine truth.) - this is greater than everything! It is greater than everything! This imbued me with such a type of joy, and such a type of daas (-realization of knowledge), there are no words that can be said to convey what this imbued me with! Nu, go scream, “I am Solomon”….. (*The Medrash in Ruth 5:6 recounts how a demon replaced Solomon on the throne, banishing him. Solomon went around telling people the reality that it was in fact he who is Solomon, but no one would believe him). If there is even one person who accepts this, it is yet something! - - It is not so simple, it isn't something so simple, how can there be such a thing?! We see – a great soul, a Rosh Yeshiva (-dean of a yeshiva), a kabalist - - but here there is just something of an empty vessel… this is from the Rebbe'ns wonders, this is from Rebbe'ns wonders! And this is what the holy Rebbe loved, just simplicity! To run away from the “chaizoo <appearance/facade of> hai <this> alma <world>,” from “Kuvoad <honor> hamidooma <imaginary, phoney, mock, feigned>,” not to hold of oneself - - I can not hold from myself… If one is a lamdan (-skilled scholar)- if he is humble this is a tremendous thing! But a nothing?!…. * [The tomb of R' Yisroel Karduner] R' Yisroel lies in Tiberius, in the cemetery (“field”), over there is a tombstone, the only tombstone in the field which states: “Rabbi Yisroel Breslover,” engraved in the tombstone… by no one is there written another name other than the Jewish name which he was given – just how he was called by name in his life, that is what is written on the tombstone. - - “Rabbi Yisroel Breslover son of Rabbi Yehuda Halevi” his father's name was Rabbi Yehuda, he was a Levite, “9 Cheshvon (5)679 (-Tuesday, October 15, 1918)” - that is what is written on the tombstone, there have already been changes done there, HY helped that they find it, it is written on the tombstone, “Rabbi Yisroel Breslover,” one sees this with the eyes…. In his life he was called, “Rabbi Yisroel Breslover,” and on his tombstone it is written, “Rabbi Yisroel Breslover”… not any praise, just the name and the date of the yartzeit (-anniversary of death). *