The Prayer Leader
The Prayer Leader Oy oy oy. The holy Rebbe told over to us the Story of the Prayer Leader (“Baal Tefila” - #12 of the Legendary Tales), there was a story, once there was a prayer leader - - and so forth, the entire story. And over there are such dear – such holy words, and such a type of holy wisdom. “The country of wealth” - the entire world is “the country of wealth!” Not just some country! - This is “the country of wealth!” By the world the main importance – the main honor – is money! The more money one has – the more honor he is given. Nu, and the Prayer Leader – the men that he drew close to Hashem Yisburach – by them a fast or a penance – the biggest penance – was for them a taanoog (exquisite delight) more than all the pleasures of the world! And the men of the Prayer Leader sat (-lived) outside of civilization. Because civilization is the opposite from Rebbe'n! When one merits to be drawn close to Rebbe'n, and one merits to eat his “holy food” (*See the story; the food had the potency of giving one the full awareness of the utter stench and degradation of money) – his holy Toaroas (-teachings), this is the opposite from the civilized world! In the story it is written – that suddenly people went missing from the country, there whereabouts wasn't known… yeah, they were lost!… When one draws close to Rebbe'n he goes out of the civilized world, he is lost! * Nu, one must keep the first clause (“si-eef”) of the Shulchan Aruch: “One shall not have shame from the mockers!” (*See also Likutay Halachos, Laws of Meat in Milk 5:27 which cites this clause and builds on it). One should not desist, one should not have shame from the mockers! - - “Holy brazenness” - that one should stand against the world! Yeah, one should have faith in Rebbe'n as much as possible, and listen and do as he taught us, not to be moved (-astounded, intimidated) from anyone! There are obstacles? This is for the best! The more difficult it is, the heavier toll it is on one's well-being, and the more one endures – all the better! (*See Likutay Moharan 185. And see Likutay Halachos, Laws of Making Vessels Kosher, 4:18, “And this is the fundamental of man's coming into this world, in order that he should have tests and obstacles such as these from drawing close to Hashem Yisburach, and he surmounts with the overwhelming force of his holy desire, and breaks (through) all of them etc., and then all the obstacles will be reversed for him to be great benefits, because through the breaking of the impediments there are made afterwards, vessels to receive the sweet light (in) step by step and in measure. For it is impossible for one to receive except with a vessel, and they are made in this world specifically through breaking impediments, as is understood from his words o.b.m. elsewhere.”) The holy Rebbe said (Life of Our Leader Rabbi Nachman, article 318), “To me it is difficult to draw close to” - “it is difficult to draw close to me!” Because every time that we take the Likutay Moharan, and we want to draw close to the holy Rebbe'n – there arise the greatest obstacles from all sides. They don't let up (-leave him be), either from the yaitzehr hura (-evil inclination), or from the bodily desires, or from the world (-people) – Round and around (-all around) “battles!” Nu, but the holy Rebbe is a geebor (-mighty warrior), and he teaches us how to be geeboarim (-mighty warriors), how to hold up in battle. * [Continuing about the Story of the Rav and the Only Son] Oy oy oy oy. And so every story, and every Torah, and every word from holy Rebbe'n. The story of the Rav and the Only Son, how the son begged the father – he wants to travel to the tzaddik. Nu, he was an only son to his father, he didn't want to let him travel alone, so the father deterred him; it is not fitting for you, you are a bigger lamdan (-skilled scholar) than him, of greater lineage than him, it is not befitting for you to travel to this tzaddik! So he didn't travel. In short, he saw that he serves HY, he learns and prays constantly, and he feels nothing (-no “taam” - taste). So the young men told him again the aitzu (-advice, remedy): Travel to the tzaddik so-and-so. He went again to (his) father, and pleaded very much with him. In short, the father saw that he is pleading with him very much, so he said to him, “Nu, we will travel, but what then – we will see if it is not orchestrated from Heaven (-go smoothly) we will return! Nu, they set out, and they came to a small bridge and a horse fell in the bridge (-off into the water), and the wagon turned over, and they almost drowned. He (the father) said to him, “Nu, you see already that it isn't from Heaven that we should travel to this tzaddik!”… So they returned. He applied himself further to the task of constant Torah and prayer. However he felt that he was missing something, and he didn't feel anything (“taam” - taste) in the Torah and prayer! So he once again begged the (-his) father that he desires to travel, he pleaded with him very much. The father set out with him, and (the son) said to him that only if this will be something very dramatic we should return, it is a sign that it (-the trip) is not from Heaven!… * One can be a chuchum (-scholar) - - with all the desires of this world, with the entire world - - and be a Breslover!… I knew (“recognized”) in Tiberius, binay (-members – committed and living a lifestyle of) Torah, I grew up amongst them, and I merited to see the difference between R' Yisroel'n and them. They were; Men of prominence, smart (“chachumim”), and intelligent (“nivoanim”), and men of action (“anshay maaseh”), and Heaven fearing, and particular care (“midakdikim”) in keeping the mitzvoas – and the honor with the “chaizoo (-facade) oalum hazeh (of this world)” was found before them over the whole world! And they were missing something?! On the contrary – they were missing absolutely nothing! However, the holy Rebbe told over a story of the Rav and the Only Son, that the only son was deficient! He was always engaged in Torah and prayer, and there was missing from him a deficiency, he didn't feel anything (“taam” - taste) in the Torah and prayer! There were two young men (youngerman -the inference is that they were also occupied in Torah study) – they gave him an aitzu (-advice, remedy) that he should travel to the tzaddik! From this we see, that the entire lacking which he didn't feel anything in the Torah and prayer, was because he needed to go to the tzaddik! It is possible to learn up the story – however one must give heart (-pay attention), that the holy Rebbe had mercy on us and so he told over to us the story – for us! So (/that) we learn out from the story hints, that one can be an only son by a rav, and he can have a room in the attic, and he can be regularly engaged in Torah and prayer, and the only son felt a lacking – he didn't feel anything (“taam” - taste) in the Torah and prayer! And he searched for an aitzu (advice, remedy) how he can fill the deficiency, he asked two young men (youngerman -see above), and they gave him an aitzu (advice, remedy) that he should travel to the tzaddik! From this we see – he had searched, so HY brought about circumstances that two young men told him that he should travel to the tzaddik. However when one is engaged in Torah and prayer, and doesn't feel the deficiency, on the contrary – one feels just that he is great and great and great - - (* See Likutay Halachos, Yoreh Dayah – Laws of Orla 5:7, “And in truth, they are contingent one upon the other, because each person, according to how much he strives to abnegate himself and to feel with simplicity his lowliness, to feel the pain of his sins and defects, and his utter alienation from Hashem Yisburach and the Torah etc., so too he merits to draw himself close the true tzaddik. Because certainly one who feels his lowliness and inferiority, and desires to have mercy on his soul, to be saved from eternal death and suffering, and to merit to eternal life, certainly he will not look (-pay attention) upon any impediment, which are mostly if not all due to honor, that one fears that they will mock him and belittle etc.. And even other types of obstacles, from one's wife, and father-in-law, and one's father etc., all of them are completely nullified by someone who feels a little of his lowliness and inferiority, and he sees and understands in himself the manner of his standing and position in this world, and to where his conduct veered etc.. And certainly he will endeavor with all his strength to draw himself close to someone who can engage in his healing, and through this he will draw close to the truth, which is the true tzaddik. And the more he draws close to the true tzaddik, so too he will feel his lowliness more, because the main abnegation of haughtiness (-ego) is through the tzaddik etc..”). The only son would search regularly, and HY would always bring about for him – the first time the horse fell (from) the bridge, and the second time the axles broke on him, and the second time, the only son said, we cannot – only if it is something distinctive. So he (-they) traveled , and he (-they) were in a lodging in some village, and there they found some sort of merchant. Nu, a merchant should speak of tzaddikim?! A merchant should speak of commerce! Nu, they spoke with him, and they came to speak of tzaddikim – they didn't tell over to the merchant that they were traveling to this tzaddik, they just plainly spoke of tzaddikim. And he began speaking of this tzaddik – they didn't say that they were traveling to him [and the merchant said that he was there and he (the tzaddik) had committed] a transgression! He is frivolous (“light” - without fear of Heaven)! He (the Rav) said to his son, “Nu, do you see?! Do you see already?! The merchant did not [intend to speak of this tzaddik, just] speaking innocently!… Nu, in short, they returned, and the son passed away! Because if one does not surmount over all the types of obstacles, he is nebach (pitifully, unfortunately) dead in his life – he is one who died! One can be great, and have a name (-reputation, acclaim) in the world, and he is dead! * And similarly every story, with every seecha (talk, discourse), when one does not look with truth – from yearning, like the only son – he yearned to fill his deficiency – he felt nothing (no “taam” - taste) in Torah and in prayer! Nu, when one looks, one finds. One can look and look and look, but when it comes to it - - in truth, when one ponders, it is possible that the merchant was not speaking innocently!…. *