קצא

Overview: Wednesday, Parshas Balak — Breslov. Written in the open field. His daughter's great suffering — *homa alai libi*. The Makom will heal even through doctors — *asher hema mei'hevel yachad* (Tehillim 62:10) — *tov Hashem lakol l'chol hamakos* (Tehillim 145:9) — for the sake of His abundant mercies and His true *tzaddikim*. Then the extraordinary passage: *rabbos machshavos b'lev ish* (Mishlai 19:21) — a thought came today before prayer to hasten the wedding immediately after Shabbas. Close in his mind — but not spoken to anyone yet — still deliberating. Mind very preoccupied. Urge the *anshei sh'lomaynu* in Tulchin to send the *zuppitze* garment. Perhaps the wedding tomorrow — a wagon will be sent. Closing to *anshei sh'lomaynu*: *bitni malei millim* (Iyov 32:18) — but impossible in the open field. Settle yourselves well in this world — devise strategies every day to find a *derech v'nativ u'mesillah* — a way, a path, a highway to draw close to Hashem. At least be saved from the pit of destruction. *Ha'emes eid l'atzmo. Ohavchem be'emes la'netzach hamedaber l'tovatam v'hatzlachatam hanitzchit be'emes.*

The time of song has arrived [עֵת הַזָּמִיר הִגִּיעַ — Shir Hashirim 2:12: hazamir nishma b'artzeinu — "the time of singing has come — and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land." The verse of springtime and arrival — the world awakening to its joy.

My beloved son — my dear one.

I received your letter just now — and my heart yearns over the greatness of your pain from your daughter — may she live [הוֹמֶה עָלַי לִבִּי — Yirmiyahu 4:19: the prophet's cry of physical-spiritual anguish. Reb Nussun reaches for this verse to express his own parental pain at seeing Yitzchok suffer over his daughter] . The Makom will have mercy and hasten to heal her from Heaven — even though you are making use of the doctor — for they are of mere vanity together [אֲשֶׁר הֵמָּה מֵהֶבֶל יָחַד — Tehillim 62:10: "they are of vanity together." Applied to doctors: their remedies are of no ultimate substance — vanity — and yet Hashem can work through them if He wishes] [Tehillim 62:10] — even so Hashem is good to all — for all blows and for all things [Tehillim 145:9] — and we have no one to lean on except upon Him — Yisborach — Who will act for the sake of His abundant mercies [לְמַעַן רַחֲמָיו הַמְרֻבִּים — for the sake of His many mercies: not on the basis of merit but purely through Hashem's overflowing compassion] — and for the sake of His true *tzaddikim* — and save us quickly in all that we need to be saved. Amen — so may it be His will.

And behold — many are the thoughts in a man's heart [Mishlai 19:21] and so forth. And today before the prayer a thought began to come to me to hasten to make the wedding immediately after Shabbas Kodesh — and it is close in my mind to establish it so. But I have not yet spoken of this with any person — for I still need to deliberate about it. Therefore from yourself you will understand how preoccupied my mind is just now — and it is impossible for me to extend at all. Only you — do what is yours to do. And hasten to urge the *anshei sh'lomaynu* who are in Tulchin to send me a *zuppitze* [זוּפִּיצֶע — a type of fabric or garment — likely a *župan* or similar Eastern European upper garment — needed for the wedding of Reb Nussun's son] for my son — may he live — for it is very close that the wedding will be immediately after Shabbas Kodesh. And now it is rising in my mind to make the wedding tomorrow — if Hashem wills. And in all likelihood I will send a wagon for you if it is to be tomorrow — and if it is to be after Shabbas Kodesh — I will inform you by early post — or on Sunday through a messenger. And may the Good Hashem do and guide me in the path of truth — and complete for me for good — and may He accept the letters in accordance with His address [וִיקַבֵּל הַמִּכְתָּבִים לְאַדֶּרֶס — Reb Nussun asks that Hashem receive and accept his prayers to their proper destination — the *adres* — address — being a Yiddish-Russian word for destination. A touching image: petitions sent upward like letters to an address] — and from yourself you will understand how to conduct yourself — and to Hashem belongs the salvation. And peace to all our *anshei sh'lomaynu* with great love — to each and every one according to the preciousness of his exalted station. Behold — my belly is full of words to speak with them [בִּטְנִי מָלֵא מִלִּים — Iyov 32:18: Elihu's declaration before he speaks: "I am full of words — the spirit within me compels me." Applied here with deep warmth: Reb Nussun has so much to say to the *anshei sh'lomaynu* — but the circumstances prevent it] [Iyov 32:18] — but it is impossible in the open field [עַל פְּנֵי הַשָּׂדֶה — written outdoors again — al p'nei hasadeh — as in Letter 187. Reb Nussun is not at his desk but in the open air] — and also my mind is very preoccupied just now — as my son — may he live — will tell you. Please greatly — to stand in my assistance beyond your capacity at a time like this — as you will understand the greatness of the necessity for this. And may Hashem open your eyes and strengthen your hearts — that you settle yourselves well well in this world — and devise strategies every day to find a way and a path and a highway — how to draw close to Hashem Yisborach and to His holy Torah [דֶּרֶךְ וְנָתִיב וּמְסִלָּה — three different words for road and path: *derech* — a main road; *nativ* — a path; *mesillah* — a raised highway or causeway. The triple image suggests that every kind of approach — broad or narrow, easy or difficult — should be sought in the quest to draw close to Hashem] — and at any rate how to be saved from the pit of destruction — and with whom to join yourself in this fleeting shadow — in a way that there will be hope for your future — and that your toil should not be in vain — G-d forbid. And the truth is its own witness. [cf. Shabbas 55a] Your true lover forever — who speaks for their good and their true eternal success in truth. Nussun the above-mentioned. The words of your father — greatly preoccupied — who awaits salvation. Nussun of Breslov.

[Hebrew: נָתָן מִבְּרֶסְלֶב...]