Siman 151

(1.) In the year 5566 [1805/6] — the fourth year of his residence here in Breslov, which was the fourth year of my drawing close to him — for upon his entering here I drew close to him immediately, as mentioned above [#115] — then in that summer of 5566, in the month of Sivan, his holy infant son Shlomo Ephraim of blessed memory passed away. And it is already explained elsewhere [above #28] regarding this dear holy child — what Rabbainu o.b.m. said, that he was already prepared etc. And then, after the passing of the aforementioned child, when we came to him, he began to speak with us about the rectification of souls — about the matter of the Master of the Field: that there is a field in which souls grow, and the Master of the Field is needed to rectify them. And one who girds his loins to be Master of the Field has immeasurable sufferings upon him, as is explained in the Torah "And Boaz said to Ruth" in Likutay vol. 1, Torah 65 — see there. And from then on he spoke much about the rectification of souls. And particularly after he came from Lemberg — particularly upon his entry to Uman — for his entire entry there, and his choosing to pass on there and to be buried there, was all because of this: for the rectification of the souls in need of rectification from several hundred years. For there in Uman many, many souls were killed beyond measure — and many thousands of children who were killed before their time etc. — as is understood from his conversations in Uman, some of which are recorded elsewhere [below #190, 191]. And then, in that year [5566], he began to tell the legendary tales that are now printed. And he said: "Now I will begin to tell legendary tales" [in Yiddish: "ich vel shoin on heiben mayses derzeilin"]. And then on the following Rosh Hashana — which was Rosh Hashana 5567 — he said the Torah "Rabbi Shimon opened" [Torah 60] which speaks about legendary tales etc. And then on that same Yom Kippur there was a great fire here in Breslov, G-d save us, at the time of the Kol Nidre prayer — at the hour the cantor began the piyyutim after Maariv, namely Ya'aleh etc. — and we all scattered to save his house and possessions, and the prayer was disrupted. Only after the fire was completed at night, a minyan gathered — and Rabbainu z"l was also with us — and we completed the piyyutim. And then on Motzai Yom Kippur Rabbainu z"l said that on that Yom Kippur he had desired to accomplish a matter before Hashem Yisburach — <span style="color:#b8a060; font-style:italic;" title="הַשְׁמָטָה — הַתּוֹרָה"><that is, he desired that Hashem Yisburach return and say to him the Torah as He did before Moshe Rabbainu upon him be peace></span> — and he had many arguments for this. The matters he claimed to Hashem Yisburach, if they were to be written down, would fill many pages [bogin / gilyonos]. And I made for myself a great order regarding the aforementioned. But through the fire the matter was disrupted. <p>And also after he came from Lemberg he spoke about this matter — and it was understood from his words that from the time he had desired on Yom Kippur to accomplish this, because of this there was a great accusation against him Above, and the illness and sufferings he had and still had was because of this. And he said: even though my intention was certainly for the sake of Heaven — even so etc. And he told then the incident of the son of the Rabbi of Shpitivkeh, who was ill and knew that it was because of a sin he had committed in failing to honor his father — and yet he understood in his heart that he did not truly repent etc. And he told this against himself — that even though he knows that his sufferings and illness are because of the aforementioned matter — even so he does not repent in his heart. And he said that Rabbi Shmuel Yitzchak — who is now the Rabbi in Tcherin — had informed him beforehand of the fire that would occur. And also in Medvedivkeh there had been a fire, and Rabbi Shmuel Yitzchak was there at that time and informed me in advance — and the name Shmuel Yitzchak in gematria equals "fire" [sereyfah] as written in the Torah deficiently [Genesis 29]. And in that same year I was compelled to move from my place from Nemrov to Mohlev. And in that year many of our people became confused — Rabbi Avrahamtzi was in Petersburg and many were greatly confused. And Rabbainu z"l himself was wandering in that year on the great journey that he traveled to Navoritch and Brod etc. and he was delayed on that journey approximately half a year. And in that winter when he was in Tcherin for Shabbos Shira and afterwards in Kremenchtchak as was his custom every year — there was born his grandson Rabbi Yisrael of blessed memory, son of his righteous daughter Moras Sarah. And his birth was before Rabbainu z"l traveled the aforementioned journey, and immediately after he came from Kremenchtchak he traveled on the aforementioned journey. And before the birth he sat for several weeks in Kremenchtchak and waited until she would give birth. And throughout that entire period before she gave birth he did not show a cheerful face at all, and was strict when they served him two dishes at a meal — for his eyes longed all day that his daughter should give birth safely. And he was in great distress all that time until the birth. And then after the birth he immediately became filled with joy and commanded to light candles and to make a drink called "punch" [mixed with wine, honey and water] and was in great joy. And afterwards on the eighth day he circumcised his infant grandson as was proper. And after the bris milah he was joyful that day and said he had satisfaction from what he heard from people etc. who mentioned that his name was Yisrael ben Sarah — like the name of the Baal Shem Tov z"l. But afterwards on the third day after the circumcision his daughter who had given birth became weakened, and he had great distress and fled in great haste from Kremenchtchak. And he said that his life force was cut off from the greatness of the distress. And the man who was with him — Rabbi Shmuel of Teplik — lingered a bit, and he left him there and did not wait for him and traveled without him. And Rabbi Shmuel was compelled to hire a wagon and run after him. And afterwards when he came from Kremenchtchak he traveled to Navoritch and the entire great journey mentioned above. And in that winter I was ill three times in Mohlev — and so were my wife and children — and Rabbainu z"l had great distress over this. And through G-d's kindness and through the power of his holy prayer I remained alive, praise G-d. And in all this matter there is much to tell — for there are very hidden matters in all this, hidden treasures of the King, which he merited to attain in all these matters, for which he was compelled to wander so much and to bear so many sufferings — all for the rectification of the worlds, the rectification of the souls and spirits of the living, and especially the souls of the dead — which he occupied himself with more at the end of his days, as he said explicitly: what he does for us is a small thing for him and that we need to do ourselves — but he must occupy himself with the rectification of the souls of the dead, for there are naked souls etc. as explained elsewhere [Sichos HaRan §23, 195]. And even if we have not heard and do not know of all this even as a drop from the sea — and even the little of the little with which he took mercy on us and informed us, it is impossible to explain except a little of a little by allusion — even so I did not refrain from noting what was possible, for it is a great good for those who truly desire it, who are diligent at his gates — when they know what they know of what passed over him and what came forth from his holy mouth in these matters. And the enlightened ones who study our words with a true eye will understand a little of the greatness of the Creator Yisburach through all this, and the greatness of the tzaddikim, and how many sufferings and troubles they bear for the rectification of our souls — perhaps through all this one will be awakened to go in his holy ways which he taught us in his holy books, and we will return to Hashem in truth, speedily in our days, Amen.