Letter 9 ט

"Between the Straits [בין המצרים] — light will shine for the upright and the wholehearted, the servants of Hashem in truth and in wholeness." [An opening flourish drawing on the language of the period — the Three Weeks leading up to Tisha B'Av — but turning it to hope rather than sorrow: even in the Straits, light will shine for the true servants of G‑d] To the honor of my dear and mighty friend, beloved to me as my soul — my daughter, my sister, my mother [בתי אחותי אמי — an extraordinary string of endearments drawn from the language of the Song of Songs; used here for a male friend, expressing the deepest possible closeness and love], the delight of my eyes, the desire of my heart, and the entirety of my life and soul — his soul is bound to mine — one soul in two bodies [a classical expression of true friendship, drawn from Aristotle and absorbed into Talmudic and Kabbalistic thought; here expressing the bond between R' Shmuel and R' Shlomo Veksler] — the distinguished and great talmid chacham, the Chassid, who fears G‑d — whose every aspiration, desire, and will is solely to do the will of Hashem and the will of the true Tzadikim, and to be bound to them with a strong and firm bond, forever, like a peg that will never be pulled out — who drinks living waters from Na Nach Nachma Nachman MayUman [מננמ"ח — the holy acronym of the Petek: נ נח נחמ נחמן מאומן; appearing here explicitly in the original text — one of the earliest documented uses of this formulation in this collection], the purifying river that cleanses from all stains and sins, who is close to the holy gravesite [לציס"ע — near the holy gravesite of our master] of Rabbainu, the holy and awesome Nachman [רבינו הקוה"נ — Rabbainu the Holy and Awesome Nachman], of blessed and holy memory, may his merit protect us and all Israel, Amen and so may it be His will — the distinguished Torah scholar, our Master R' Shlomo Veksler, may he live.

A very, very great wonder to me — beyond all measure — concerning you, my dear friend, beloved to me as my own soul: I have still not received from your honor any word whatsoever. Let your honor know that the mental obstruction [mniyas hamoyach — מניעת המוח] is very great — beyond all measure. Therefore let your honor have compassion and pity on me, and inform me of clear things regarding my journey to Jerusalem. Here in Tzfas, may it be established — [Yiddish:] "I am going to ruin. I have no one to learn with, not even a word to say, not even a person to speak with. It is a great source of compassion for me." [Hebrew parenthetical immediately following:] (I am going to ruin. I have no one to learn with, not even a single word — not a person to speak with. It is a great [source of] compassion for me.)

And let him inform me whether he has spoken on my behalf with R' Zerach Epstein, etc. And let your honor know that my journey depends on this: a house and livelihood. If I will have even a private room — one cubit by one cubit [אמה על אמה — a cubit is roughly half a meter; used here hyperbolically to mean: even the smallest, most minimal private space] — and a fixed, steady income of a few coins each month — on that very same day I will travel to Jerusalem.

Therefore let your honor look into this and inform me of clear things. And let him appease me for his distance [יפייסני על התרחקותי — his long absence and silence], so that this distancing shall become the beginning of a drawing-near. And let him make amends for the abandonment of the sin [ויתקן בעזיבת החטא — playfully using the language of repentance: abandoning sin as the way to make right what went wrong] — by increasing in words of encouragement [hischazkus], conversations [sichos], holy speech, and good counsel for the service of G‑d, blessed be He.

If I have sinned against your honor — do not look at that, and turn to my request. [Yiddish — triple repetition:] "Have mercy! Have mercy! Have mercy!" [האט רחמנות — three times, like a cry] [Hebrew:] "Have compassion! Oh have compassion! Oh have compassion!" And I await G‑d, blessed be He, that He will certainly have compassion on me, and that he [R' Alter] will exert himself on my behalf in all that is in his power — for my witness is in the heavens [סהדי במרומים — a phrase from the Book of Job 16:19: "Even now my witness is in heaven" — used here to swear sincerity: G‑d above knows my heart is purely for Heaven's sake] that my intention is for the sake of Heaven. And let him fulfill my request and inform me of clear things.

Postscript — To R' Yankel [Yaakov], may he live forever: Heartfelt greetings from the depths of the heart to the honor of my friend, my dear R' Yankel [יענקלי], may he live forever, the G‑d-fearing one. Please inform me why my dear friend R' Alter is angry with me, and inform me of your welfare and your situation — all at length. And do you yearn for Meron? And especially R' Alter — does he yearn? And how is your spiritual situation? Write it all to me at length.

Postscript — To R' Shlomo Atik, may he live: Heartfelt greetings from the very depths of a burning heart to the honor of my dear friend — of whom one can say: "Acquire for yourself a friend" [קנה לך חבר — Avos 1:6: the highest designation of friendship] — diligent in Torah and Divine service, outstanding in Torah and Divine service, etc. — the distinguished Torah scholar, R' Shlomo Atik, may he live. First, I inform you, my dear friend, that we are, blessed be G‑d, in good health. And know that I wait with utterly longing eyes to already be in Jerusalem, the Holy City, at the Torah study institution [ישיבת ת"ח — the yeshivah] — to learn with you together. And I await G‑d, blessed be He, that very soon, G‑d willing, I will be in Jerusalem. And my heartfelt request before you is that you inform me of your situation — in spiritual and in material matters. And how does Jerusalem appear to you? And in what subjects are you studying? And how — is it with sharpness [חריפות — incisiveness and depth of analysis]? [Yiddish:] "And how did you come to enter the yeshivah?" "Write everything to me at length." "And what must one know before entering the yeshivah?" [Hebrew parenthetical:] (And how did your acceptance into the yeshivah come about — easily or with difficulty? Write it all to me at length, and what one needs to know before entering the yeshivah.) From me — your friend who awaits to be there very soon, to be diligent together in Torah and Divine service, day and night, as our souls desire and as G‑d wills. From me, Shmuel Horowitz. Please write me an immediate reply.

My dear friend — after inquiring of your good, dear, and beloved welfare with great love, from the very depths of the heart — I hereby inform him of my welfare as well: I, thank G‑d, have life and peace with me. May Hashem grant that we merit to be together very soon in Meron, to serve Hashem in truth as He desires it — and as our master Nachman [Na Nach Nachma Nachman MayUman], of blessed memory, and his holy disciples desire it — Amen, so may it be His will. [Yiddish — heartfelt and direct:] "My dear, warm, and good friend — it is a very great wonder to me: how is it that you have completely forgotten me and want to know nothing of me at all? I do not know — it appears you are angry with me. Indeed, there is something to be angry about — but even so: one who begins a mitzvah is told to complete it, and it is named only after the one who completes it [the Talmudic reproach he has now used in several letters]." [Yiddish continued:] "From the time we parted — when I traveled to arrange the shiduch [שידוך — betrothal / engagement; this is the first mention of R' Shmuel's engagement — a major new development] at a good and auspicious hour — from then on I have had no word at all from you. And even when you sent letters to R' Noson — you did not even include for me a single greeting. You cannot imagine in the slightest the pain and anguish of my soul from this — without measure and without reckoning. And then when I sent you several letters from the very depths of my heart — and received no reply at all — I do not know what to think. You cannot depict to yourself my suffering from this. I plead with you greatly — oh (Gott!) — have compassion on me and write to me why you have forgotten me so completely. I hoped for good and there is none — and my hope is for the longing of the eyes and the fainting of the soul, G‑d forbid." [Yiddish continued:] "Oh (Gott!) my warm-hearted brother — do not let go to ruin all the toil, the self-sacrifice, and all the strength you invested in me. How can you forget me? Believe me — I do not forget you for even a single moment. I yearn and long after you — I have yearning and longing for you beyond all measure. How can you forget what we worked together in Meron, and at the Western Wall, and at Shimon HaTzadik [the tomb of Shimon HaTzadik in Jerusalem — a site of pilgrimage], and at the grave of Rachel our Mother? We were always together — and how can you forget what we spoke as we walked on our hisbodidus on Friday, returning from Shimon HaTzadik? We spoke then that we would always be bound together, one to the other — always companions in the service of Hashem to serve G‑d, blessed be He. Oh (Gott!) — how can you forget what we toiled and suffered together? The Daughter of the King [הבת מלכה — an enigmatic reference; likely the Shabbos Queen, or possibly a Breslov mystical concept; or perhaps a specific story or teaching of Rabbainu referred to by this name] said: great compassion upon me and upon you — upon what we parted from." [Yiddish continued — the call to come to Meron:] "Oh (Gott!) my dear brother — save yourselves — and see to work with all your strength to be together for these several months in Meron. And regarding Meron — know this: one can sit there and serve Hashem without any confusion, without any obstruction, without any delay. We can acquire for ourselves in these several months as much as in several years. I am sitting there now since the first of Tammuz [meaning: R' Shmuel is now already in Meron! He has been there since Rosh Chodesh Tammuz — approximately since June/July 1923], and I am truly being revived. Oh (Gott!) — one can attain wholeness there! There is no finer place than this. Oh (Gott!) — have compassion on yourselves and on me. We will engage, G‑d willing, in Rabbainu's matter with enthusiasm — and this will take root permanently." [Yiddish:] "For your information — everything is ready, nothing is lacking: a house, vessels, money — it will also not be lacking for you. I have four lirot [pounds of currency] — just for you. Only: speak with R' Avner and come with him, and bring all your things and all the books of Rabbainu the Holy and Awesome Nachman, of blessed memory. And for the sake of Heaven — write me immediately a reply: how are you, your health — everything at length. And whether you are resolved to come, and when — everything at length. Immediately — a clear, correct, and true reply." Hebrew parallel of the above [enclosed within the same packet — a Hebrew re-rendering of the same letter for R' Alter Ben Tzion himself, addressed directly to him:] My good, warm, and dear friend — it is a great wonder to me: how is it that you have completely forgotten me, and do not want to know anything of me at all? I do not know — it appears you are angry with me. Indeed, there is something to be angry about — but even so: one who begins a mitzvah is told to complete it, and it is named only after the one who completes it. From the time we parted — when I traveled to arrange the shiduch at a good and auspicious hour — from then I have had no word from you at all. And even when you sent letters to R' Noson — you did not even include a single greeting for me. You cannot imagine the depth of my pain and anguish of soul from this — without measure and without reckoning. And then when I sent you several letters from the very depths of my heart and received no reply — I do not know what to think. You cannot depict to yourself my suffering from this. I plead with you greatly — oh! (Gott!) — have compassion on me and write to me why you have forgotten me so. I hoped for good and there is none — and my hope is for longing eyes and fainting of soul [a paraphrase of Lamentations 3:18 and 4:17: the language of Tisha B'Av — perfectly fitting the Three Weeks period in which this is written], G‑d forbid. Oh (Gott!) my warm-hearted brother — do not let go to ruin all the toil, the self-sacrifice, and all the strength you invested in me. How can you forget me? Believe me — I do not forget you for even a single moment. I yearn and long after you — I have yearning and longing for you beyond all measure. How can you forget what we worked together in Meron, and at the Western Wall, and at Shimon HaTzadik, and at the grave of Rachel our Mother? We were always together — and how can you forget what we spoke as we went on our hisbodidus on Friday, on the way back from Shimon HaTzadik? We spoke then that we would always be bound together, one to the other — always companions in the service of Hashem, to serve G‑d, blessed be He. Oh! (Gott!) — how can you forget what we toiled and suffered together? The Daughter of the King said: great compassion upon me and upon you — upon what we parted from. Oh! (Gott!) my dear brother — save yourselves! And see to work with all your strength to be together for these several months in Meron. And regarding Meron — know this: one can sit there and serve Hashem without any confusion, without any obstruction, without any delay. We can acquire Divine service for ourselves in these several months as much as in several years. I am sitting there now since Rosh Chodesh Tammuz — and I am truly being revived. Oh! (Gott!) — one can attain wholeness there! There is no finer place. Oh! (Gott!) — have compassion on yourselves and on me. We will engage, G‑d willing, in Rabbainu's matter with enthusiasm — and this will take root permanently. For your information — everything is ready, nothing is lacking: a house, vessels, money — it will not be lacking for you either. I have four lirot — just for you. Only: speak with R' Avner and come with him, and bring all your things and all the books of Rabbainu, the Holy and Awesome Nachman, of blessed memory. And for the sake of Heaven — write me immediately a reply: how are you and your health — everything at length. And whether you are resolved to come, and when — everything at length. Immediately — a clear, correct, and true reply. From me — who hopes to see you soon in Meron, to be together as one man, to serve Hashem in truth. Shmuel Horowitz son of Feiga. Immediately — a good reply! Send letters to the address of R' Noson Chanhas, on behalf of Shmuel Horowitz. And I hereby seal with blessing and with the expectation of salvation from above. From me, Shmuel Horowitz. For the sake of Heaven — have compassion and pity upon me, and reply immediately, and inform me why your honor has not written to me at all until now, and has not replied to me at all.