T265 PNC - Why We Break a Clay Vessel at the Engagement

Why is a clay vessel broken at the engagement (tena'im)? The reason: the souls of the matched couple are above one — joined at the root in the upper world (see Zohar Lech Lecha 85b, Diztzach, Zohar Tazria 43a). Below, however, their connection and unification is hidden — they don't even know about their bond until the match is announced. At the moment the engagement is finalized, that hidden unity is suddenly revealed. But it is revealed in the manner of "and the chayyot ratzo va-shov" ("the living creatures running and returning," Ezekiel 1:14) — revealed and immediately concealed again, because right after engagement they separate; she remains forbidden to him until the chuppah. So at the moment of engagement, the light of their unity flashes and instantly hides. The verse continues: "and the living creatures ran and returned k'mar'eh ha-bazak (like the appearance of lightning)." The Talmud explains "bazak" as the light/spark that emerges from broken pottery — a spark that exists only for an instant. That is why we break a clay vessel: to enact the very phenomenon Yechezkel describes — the lightning-spark of revealed-and-concealed unity, exactly the dynamic of the moment of the match. (See further reasons in LM 60 and at the end of Likutey Tinyana.)