T25 (Tinyana) PNC - Hisbodidus — The Supreme Avodah, Speaking in One's Mother Tongue

Hisbodidus — being alone with Hashem in speech — is the highest practice. Set yourself at minimum one hour daily, alone in a room or out in a field, and pour out your conversation between yourself and your Maker: arguments, pleas, words of grace and conciliation, asking Him to draw you close to His service in truth. Speak in the language you actually speak — Yiddish here, in our country. Lashon hakodesh is hard to spill all your sichah in, and the heart is not drawn after words you don't live in. Yiddish (or whatever you speak) makes the heart break easily and the words come freely. Talk about everything — regret over the past, requests for the future, anything in your heart. Persist daily at a fixed hour; the rest of the day, simchah. This advice contains everything: whatever you lack in avodas Hashem, ask. Even if your words clog and you stand mute before Him — the readiness, the longing to speak with no words coming, is itself very good. Make a tefillah out of that very muteness: cry out about being too distant even to speak, and ask Him for mercy to open your mouth. Many great tzaddikim reached their level only through this. Fortunate is the one who grasps it.

Take a Torah teaching you have just learned or heard from a true tzaddik and turn it into a prayer: ask Hashem when you, too, will merit everything described in that teaching, and how far you currently are from it. Beg Him to bring you to it. The honest seeker, led by Hashem in the path of truth, will figure out from one matter how to do this for everything. Words of grace, proper arguments, pleading to be drawn close to true service — that is the form. Especially making tefillah from Torah produces enormous delights above.