רה

My beloved son — my dear one. I received your letter on the night of Hoshana Rabbah — and it was a comfort to me — for many days have I longed greatly to see the form of your handwriting [נִכְסֹף נִכְסַפְתִּי — the doubled verb of longing — from Bereishis 31:30: *nichsof nichsafta* — "you have greatly longed." Applied here to the longing to see even the physical form of a letter from Yitzchok — how much more so the person himself] . And behold — in every direction one turns — every corner and every movement — one sees the wonders of Hashem and His individual providence [הַשְׁגָּחָתוֹ יִתְבָּרַךְ בִּפְרָטִיּוּת — *hashgachah bifratiyus* — individual divine providence — the Breslov teaching that every particular detail of every moment is directly guided and overseen by Hashem] — for it never entered my mind that my whereabouts on Yom Kippur would be hidden from you and you would not know where I was — until the day after Yom Kippur. And I had directed and prepared a letter on Thursday before Erev Yom Kippur to inform you — but all is from Hashem — the pain — may the Merciful One save us — and the expansiveness — and the information and the tidings for good or for the reverse — G-d forbid — all did Hashem do beautifully in its time and its season [Koheles 3:11] — and vanity of vanities — all the toil that a person toils under the sun [Koheles 1:2–3] . And although even so — sometimes according to His will — Yisborach — one must engage in business — the toil and the exertion are certainly vanity of vanities — as we have already spoken of this on these verses in Koheles — where he says: for every time and season — for every desire — what gain has a person from all his toil [Koheles 3:1; 1:3] and so forth. And there is much to speak of this — but it is impossible in the open field — and also because of the late-night hour and the absence of leisure. And behold — all that passed every day from Rosh Hashanah until now cannot be expressed — and praised be G-d — after all the sufferings and adventures [הַהַרְפַּתְקָאוֹת — *harpatkao's* — a Talmudic Aramaic word for unexpected happenings, adventures, and encounters on the road — Reb Nussun uses this remarkable word to describe the entire surreal sequence of events since Rosh Hashanah] — everything in wondrous *chesed*. And praised be G-d — the festival passed here in peace — and Hashem Yisborach also helped me — that I danced greatly in the *beis midrash* on the night of Simchas Torah and afterwards [רָקַדְתִּי הַרְבֵּה בְּבֵית הַמִּדְרָשׁ בְּלֵיל שִׂמְחַת תּוֹרָה — Reb Nussun dances on Simchas Torah in exile — in Nemirov — among people who are not his own community — and yet he dances greatly. The dance of Simchas Torah is itself a profound expression of the *batzar hirchavta li* principle] — all in peace and with some honor. But even so — also here there were found many brazen-faced ones — from the 974 generations [תתקע\"ד דּוֹרוֹת — the 974 generations of souls that existed before the creation — described in the Talmud (Shabbas 88b) as souls that were not created through Torah — and which appear in every generation as those who oppose the truth. A standard Breslov expression for the opponents of holiness in every generation] — who could not be still — and they broke one glass in my window on the night of Simchas Torah at the time of the meal. And most of the city is very upset at them — but still it is not known who it was. And behold — in these times we have nothing to give ourselves life with except through the conversations that Hashem graced us to speak previously — that the whole world is full of sufferings — as the Sage said: the world is full of sorrows and the joy is the relief [הָעוֹלָם מָלֵא יְגוֹנוֹת וְהַשָּׂשׂוֹן הוּא הָרֶוַח — a teaching brought in Reb Nussun's own writings: the world is full of suffering — and the joy is the *revach* — the relief — the breathing space — the gap between one trouble and the next. Joy is not the absence of suffering but the gap, the breath, the momentary opening] and so forth. And although we have already spoken of this greatly — even I myself need to remind myself of this at every time. And I hoped to Hashem — for certainly Hashem will not abandon me and all of us — and *eis tzarah hi l'Yaakov u'mimennah yivvashe'a.* And behold — just now my son Rabbi Shachna is here with his son Rabbi Nachman — may they live — and I have no leisure at all — for yesterday I moved from dwelling to dwelling — and praised be G-d I now have a dwelling with some expansiveness — in the dimension of *batzar hirchavta li* — and: *ilmale lo asina l'alma ela l'mishma da dai* — if we had come into the world only to hear this — it would be enough [אִלְמָלֵא לָא אָתֵינָא לְעָלְמָא אֶלָּא לְמַשְׁמַע דָּא דַּי — an Aramaic formulation adapted from the well-known Pesach *Dayenu* structure — applied here to the teaching of *batzar hirchavta li* and the direct experience of divine providence in the details of life. If we had come to the world only to hear and know this teaching — it would have been enough] — for in this one sees the kindnesses of Hashem and His immense wonders without measure at every time. Who does great things beyond investigation [Iyov 9:10] and so forth — besides the hidden things that belong to Hashem our G-d — for He — Yisborach — does great wonders alone and so forth. I have considered my ways and have turned my feet to Your testimonies [Tehillim 119:59] . What our rabbis — of blessed memory — warned us to say: *kol mah d'avdin min sh'maya l'tav avdin* — all that Heaven does — it does for good [כָּל מַה דְּעַבְדִין מִן שְׁמַיָּא לְטָב עַבְדִין — the Talmudic Aramaic dictum (Berachos 60b): whatever is done from Heaven — is done for good. The teaching of Nochum ish Gamzu: *gam zu l'tovah* — this too is for good. The fundamental trust that everything that occurs is for good] [Berachos 60b] . And we have no one to lean on except our Father in Heaven. And know — my son — that I received from my son Rabbi Shachna on your behalf the sum that is due me from you — namely twenty-one gold coins — and you should see to send to him immediately. And now I need to begin to strengthen myself with a new trust regarding my livelihood and my many needs here in Nemirov — where my dear friends and companions are far away and so forth — as you will understand from yourself — and to Hashem belongs the salvation. The G-d Who has tended me from my beginning — and has wondroused His *chesed* with me to draw me close to such a good — to such a truth — to such a light [הָאֱלֹקִים הָרוֹעֶה אוֹתִי מֵעוֹדִי — Bereishis 48:15: Yaakov's blessing — "the G-d Who tended me from my beginning until this day." Applied here by Reb Nussun as his own personal declaration of faith from exile: the G-d Who has shepherded me from the beginning] [Bereishis 48:15] — which is my portion from all my toil — my hope and the hope of my children and offspring — for eternal eternities. May He be with me always — in His merit and His great power — and also even to old age and grey hair — do not forsake me — until I proclaim Your arm to the generation [Tehillim 71:18] and so forth. And peace to all our *anshei sh'lomaynu* with great love. The words of your father who awaits salvation. Nussun of Breslov.