יא

Please, O glorious and awesome Name — O King of glory — Who created all the world entirely for the sake of Your glory, blessed be He, as it is written: "All that is called by My Name — for My glory I have created him, I have formed him, yea, I have made him" [Isaiah 43:7]. And therefore help me through Your abundant mercies that I merit that Your glory be magnified and praised and exalted through me. And be with me in my help that I be able to nullify myself entirely and to diminish my own honor — that my honor be as nothing and emptiness, and I pay no attention to my own honor at all — only to magnify the honor of the Omnipresent [hamakom]. And may all my dealings and actions and thoughts and will be entirely only for the sake of Your great glory, blessed be He. And help me through Your abundant mercies to break and remove from me the trait of arrogance [ga'avah] — that I merit that no aspect or stirring of pride arise in my heart at all, and I merit to true humility [anavah]. And give me true intellect and wisdom from You, in such a way that I be able to bring forth the ways of humility — and be saved from invalid humility [anavah p'sulah], from humility that is for the sake of honor: for this humility is the ultimate arrogance — that my intention be, G‑d forbid, to be humble in order to be honored and esteemed through this. Rather, grant me merit through Your abundant mercies and Your great true lovingkindnesses that I merit to the ultimate [tachlis] true humility truly in truth.

Please, Hashem, filled with abundant mercy — the truly merciful One. May Your mercies and Your lovingkindnesses be aroused upon one who is despised and forsaken of men like me — that I merit to feel my lowliness in truth; and may my iniquities not cause me to be rejected, G‑d forbid, or to confuse my mind and thought with thoughts of foolishness — which are the thoughts of ulterior motive and haughtiness. Have mercy upon me for Your sake, and save me through Your abundant mercies from any aspect of pride and haughtiness in the world at all. For in truth I know that I am not worthy or deserving to draw near to You — for I have greatly blemished Your honor, as You know, Hashem my G‑d. But I lean upon Your abundant mercies, that You be with me in my help and strive for my salvation. Therefore help me, Hashem my G‑d, that my mind not be confused with any aspect of ulterior motive or arrogance at all. And have mercy upon me through Your abundant mercies and do not abandon me to stray on confused paths, G‑d forbid. And make it through Your mercies that I walk in Your statutes and keep Your ordinances truly — in the ultimate true humility truly in truth. And help me that even in the hour when You grant me merit to do good — that I not know of it myself at all, ever.

Please, Hashem, truly merciful One, filled with mercy — have compassion upon Your works; and open my mouth and my heart that I be able to set forth my speech [sicha] before You. And may I merit to arouse Your true mercies upon me — that You have mercy upon me from now, and help me that I merit to sanctify and purify myself in the holiness of the covenant [k'dushas habris], and be saved from now from all manner of blemishes of the covenant in the world. "Turn away my eyes from beholding vanity; through Your ways give me life" [Psalms 119:37]. And all that I have blemished until now in the holy covenant — for all of it may You pardon and forgive me, O You Who pardons and forgives, through Your abundant mercies and Your mighty lovingkindnesses. Whether what I have blemished in thought or in speech or in deed — whether what I have blemished through the sight of the eye and the hearing of the ear and the sense of smell — whether inadvertently or deliberately, whether under compulsion or willingly — and all manner of blemishes that I have blemished in the blemish of the covenant: for all of it may You pardon and forgive me, O gracious One Who greatly multiplies forgiveness. For the sake of Your Name, Hashem: "and forgive my iniquity for it is great" [Psalms 25:11]. And have mercy upon me, and break and cast down and subdue and nullify all the bonds and chains of the sitra achra [other side] that have been tied and grown through my many iniquities — which overpower me at every moment and wish to drag me, G‑d forbid, from blemish to blemish, and do not allow me to sanctify and purify myself in truth as is fitting. And because of this I am far from the true holiness of the covenant, as befits an Israelite man, of the seed of Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov, whom You have chosen. Master of the Universe — You know my heart; have pity and compassion upon me. And cut and tear and break and nullify all the bonds and chains of the sitra achra, until they have no power whatsoever to overpower me. And nullify them with a complete nullification, so that no memory or trace of them remain in the world at all — rather, let all the iniquities be transformed into merits [kol ha'avonos yis'hapchu liz'chuyos]. And though indeed I have not yet merited to this teshuvah — for I have not yet begun to do true teshuvah at all — even so, grant me this as a free gift and a generous act of lovingkindness. And have mercy upon me with Your great lovingkindness, and see my poverty and my toil — wherein they lie in ambush for me at every time and every hour, and torment my soul and spirit and divine spark [nishmassi] with all manner of torments, and pursue me with all manner of persecutions in the world, and wish to drive me away, G‑d forbid, from the land of the living, and they hunt my soul to take it, G‑d forbid. And though indeed I myself pursue myself more than all of them — for certainly free choice is free, and who can compel me to turn to their way, G‑d forbid. Behold, I confess and acknowledge that in truth I myself am the guilty one — in me, I myself am my master's iniquity. But what shall I do, Hashem my G‑d — for our hand has greatly weakened, and I do not know to seek any path of escape from them, or to overpower all the desires and evil thoughts that overpower me at every moment. And I have no hope except upon Your abundant mercies and Your great lovingkindnesses — that You help me and give me strength to overpower all manner of desires and evil thoughts, to subdue them and to cast them down and to break them and to remove them from me and from my borders from now and forever — that no aspect of thought whatsoever enter my mind and my thought at all, rather may my mind and my thought be holy and pure always in the ultimate holiness in its fullness. And help me through Your abundant mercies that I merit to holiness and purity — that I merit to sanctify myself within what is permitted to me. And may I merit at every turn to add holiness upon holiness, until I merit to holiness and separation [k'dushah u'prishus] in truth — until I merit that the supernal unification [yichuda ila'a] and the lower unification [yichuda tata'a] be effected through me.

Please, Hashem, help me through Your abundant mercies that I not lose my world, G‑d forbid, through the disturbance of livelihood [tirda d'parnasah]. And save me through Your abundant mercies from the blemish of the thirty-nine labors of the sitra achra — which are the thirty-nine lashes — which distract the majority of the world through the toils and distractions of this world: for they run all their days after their livelihood with very great toil and effort, eating bread in sorrow, in the sweat of their face eating bread until they return to the ground — and nothing shall they carry with them in their toil. For the distraction of livelihood confuses them all their days and prevents them from remembering and taking to heart their ultimate purpose — what shall they do on the day of reckoning [yom p'kudah].

Please, Hashem, filled with abundant mercy — have mercy upon me and upon all our fellowship and upon all Your people the House of Israel, and save us from all this. And grant us merit that we not be distracted at all by the disturbance of livelihood. And even at the time when we are compelled to engage in some business or commerce for the sake of livelihood — help us through Your abundant mercies that everything be in holiness and purity, in truth and in faithfulness according to Your good will, without distraction and without confusion of the mind at all. And may we know and believe that everything is from You and not through our own [effort] at all. And all our business and activity in commerce and livelihood affairs — let it all be clarified and refined, until all the thirty-nine labors illuminate and be included in the dew of lights drawn from Your great Name. And all the thirty-nine labors shall be in holiness and purity, in the aspect of the labor of the Mishkan [m'leches haMishkan]. And bless the work of our hands, and send blessing and success in all our business and activity. And prepare our livelihood before we need it — in abundance and not in constraint, in what is permitted and not in what is forbidden — from beneath Your wide and full hand. "And may the pleasantness of Hashem our G‑d be upon us; and the work of our hands, establish it upon us, and the work of our hands, establish it" [Psalms 90:17]. And help us, Hashem, that we be glad in our portion always — and may our Torah be fixed [keva] and our work temporary [ara'i]. And even in that brief hour when we must engage in some business or commerce for the necessity of our livelihood — even then may we be cleaving to You and to Your holy Torah, which is clothed and hidden within all business affairs and labors and dealings in the world; and may we never forget You even for a single fleeting moment. עברית ▾ Master of the Universe — have mercy upon us for the sake of Your Name; and for the sake of the Shechinah of Your might; and for the sake of our fathers Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov; and for the sake of all the true tzadikim. And help us and save us and rescue and deliver us from evil slaughterers — from slaughterers who are not fitting. And guard us always that no stumbling-block of carcass or torn animal enter our mouths — for You are all-capable and nothing is withheld from You in Your planning [lo yibazeir mimcha mezimah]; and all is in Your hand. And You can guard us even now in these generations from carcasses and torn animals and from unfitting slaughterers. Have pity and compassion upon us for Your sake and not for our sake — and sanctify us in Your holiness; and distinguish us from forbidden foods; as it is written: And I distinguished you from the peoples — to be Mine [Leviticus 20:26]. And may we merit to fulfill the verse: And you shall be holy men unto Me — and flesh torn in the field you shall not eat; to the dog you shall cast it [Exodus 22:30]. And it is written: And you shall sanctify yourselves and be holy — for I am holy [Leviticus 11:44]. And may the verse be fulfilled: He gave prey to those who fear Him — He shall remember His covenant forever [Psalms 111:5]. רִבּוֹנוֹ שֶׁל עוֹלָם, רַחֵם עָלֵינוּ לְמַעַן שְׁמֶךָ, וּלְמַעַן שְׁכִינַת עֻזֶּךָ, וּלְמַעַן אֲבוֹתֵינוּ אַבְרָהָם יִצְחָק וְיַעֲקֹב, וּלְמַעַן כָּל הַצַּדִּיקִים אֲמִתִּיִּים. וְעָזְרֵנוּ וְהוֹשִׁיעֵנוּ וְהַצִּילֵנוּ וּמַלְּטֵנוּ מִשּׁוֹחֲטִים רָעִים, מִשּׁוֹחֲטִים שֶׁאֵינָם הֲגוּנִים. וְשָׁמְרֵנוּ תָמִיד שֶׁלֹּא יָבוֹא לְתוֹךְ פִּינוּ שׁוּם מִכְשׁוֹל נְבֵלָה וּטְרֵפָה, כִּי אַתָּה כֹּל תּוּכָל וְלֹא יִבָּצֵר מִמְּךָ מְזִמָּה וּבְיָדְךָ הַכֹּל, וְאַתָּה יָכוֹל לִשְׁמֹר אוֹתָנוּ גַם עַכְשָׁיו בַּדּוֹרוֹת הַלָּלוּ מִנְּבֵלוֹת וּטְרֵפוֹת וּמִשּׁוֹחֲטִים שֶׁאֵינָם הֲגוּנִים. חוּס וַחֲמֹל עָלֵינוּ לְמַעַנְךָ וְלֹא לְמַעֲנֵנוּ, וְקַדְּשֵׁנוּ בִּקְדֻשָּׁתֶךָ, וְהַבְדִּילֵנוּ מִן מַאֲכָלוֹת אֲסוּרוֹת, כְּמוֹ שֶׁכָּתוּב, וָאַבְדִּיל אֶתְכֶם מִן הָעַמִּים לִהְיוֹת לִי. וְנִזְכֶּה לְקַיֵּם מִקְרָא שֶׁכָּתוּב, וְאַנְשֵׁי קֹדֶשׁ תִּהְיוּן לִי וּבָשָׂר בַּשָּׂדֶה טְרֵפָה לֹא תֹאכֵלוּ לַכֶּלֶב תַּשְׁלִכוּן אֹתוֹ. וּכְתִיב, וְהִתְקַדִּשְׁתֶּם וִהְיִיתֶם קְדוֹשִׁים כִּי קָדוֹשׁ אָנִי. וִיקֻיַּם מִקְרָא שֶׁכָּתוּב, טֶרֶף נָתַן לִירֵאָיו יִזְכֹּר לְעוֹלָם בְּרִיתוֹ: Please, Hashem, grant me merit to reach all that I have requested before You — and help me from now that I merit to sanctify myself in the holiness of the covenant. And may I merit to nullify myself before You in truth — and let no aspect of pride or haughtiness or ulterior motive arise in my heart and mind at all; and may I merit to true and genuine humility. And help me and grant me merit that Your great glory be magnified and sanctified and praised through me. And grant me merit to illuminating words in the Torah — and may the words of Torah illuminate for me to emerge from the deficiency and lowliness of my very lowly and humble level. And may I merit that the words of Torah illuminate for me at every turn, for all the places where I need to do teshuvah — in such a way that I merit to do compensatory teshuvah [teshuvat hamishkal] in the most literal sense for all my many sins and iniquities and transgressions, and for all the blemishes I have blemished in Your great glory, blessed be He, from my youth until now. And grant me merit to repair it all in my lifetime. And help me at every turn to ascend from level to level [mi'darga l'darga], until I merit to come to the deep understandings of the Torah in its depth. And grant me merit to know and understand and attain halachah and Kabbalah, secrets [razin] and secrets of secrets [razin d'razin]. Hashem G‑d — my soul knows very well how far I am at this time from all these things — until a veil of shame is over my face to request all these things, for how can one as despised and loathsome as me request such great things. But upon Your great mercies I have leaned, and upon Your gentleness and Your goodness I have staked my pegs — for You are good to all and nothing is withheld from You. And You do great and wondrous things beyond reckoning at every time and every hour — and who shall say to You: what are You doing? Therefore my eyes are lifted to You until You are gracious to me through Your abundant mercies — to merit to reach all that I have requested before You swiftly and speedily. And if not now, when? — for already I have consumed my years in vanity and emptiness. Help me from now through Your mercies that I merit to awaken from this day to draw upon myself holiness and purity in truth, until I merit to reach all that I have requested before You. Act for the sake of Your Name, act for the sake of Your glory, act for the sake of Your holiness, act for the sake of Your Torah — for Your Name and Your glory are called upon us. And You have already promised us that You will not give Your glory to another, as it is written: "I am Hashem, that is My Name; and My glory I will not give to another, and My praise to graven images" [Isaiah 42:8]. Help us, Hashem, that Your glory be magnified through us — and may Your glory fill all the earth; may the earth light up from Your glory. "May the glory of Hashem endure forever; may Hashem rejoice in His works" [Psalms 104:31]. "Blessed be Hashem G‑d, the G‑d of Israel, Who alone does wonders. And blessed be His glorious Name forever; and may His glory fill all the earth — Amen and Amen" [Psalms 72:18–19].