The 7th of Adar — Hilulah of Moshe Rabbainu; A Mission at Meron

[Yiddish:] "My dear, warm-hearted brother — one must not sleep the time away. But one also must not fall. I understand that this coming 7th of Adar [ז' אדר — the hilulah (yahrzeit) of Moshe Rabbainu, our Teacher — traditionally observed by visiting holy graves] — the hilulah of Moshe Rabbainu — you will certainly be at Meron, at the holy Tzion of the Rashbi, of blessed memory. So: please lay many prayers there — for yourself and for me. I make you my agent [שליח] — you shall relate to the true Tzadik what is happening to me, and you shall pray greatly on my behalf. For you should know: all the deadlines have been reached [כלו כל הקיצין — a phrase from the Talmud (Sanhedrin 97b) about the End of Days; used here as a personal expression of reaching the limit of endurance]. I no longer have strength to bear all the mental obstructions and confusions, etc., etc. Is this my ultimate purpose? Is it conceivable? etc. Why do I need such a life? Surely a thousand deaths are better than such a bitter life." [Translator's note: The phrase "a thousand deaths are better than such a bitter life" (אלף מיתות טובים מחיים מרים כאלה) is an expression of extreme spiritual anguish and exhaustion — not of literal suicidal intent, but of the Breslov tradition of crying out that one's spiritual situation is like a living death. This language appears in the Psalms and is used throughout Breslov writing to express total depletion before G‑d.]

My dear brother — pray for me greatly. And you too will be helped — "one who prays for his friend is answered first" [Talmud Bavli, Bava Kamma 92a]. And exert yourself greatly — that we merit to reach the true ultimate purpose, and that there finally be an end to our troubles. For how long? How long will the baal davar yet torment and pursue? Rabbainu the Holy one, of blessed memory, said: "All my matters are prayer." And this is, to our great sorrow, the greatest exile [גלות] — that the mouth and speech are in exile [דיבור פה הוא בגלות — a teaching of Rabbainu: in this present exile, the power of holy speech and prayer is itself exiled — one cannot pray as one should; this is the deepest form of the exile]. Therefore, my brother — pray greatly at the graves of the Tzadikim, and especially at the holy Tzion, the Foundation of the World, the Rashbi, of blessed memory — for there is almost no other Tzadik who has such a connection to Rabbainu the Holy one as that Tzadik. The 7th of Adar will be a Sunday, Parashas Tetzaveh [confirming the year 5686 — 1926]. I assume you will be at Meron at the holy Tzion — and perhaps already for Shabbos. As you understand best — at least during that time be there. Pray greatly for me there, and read my note [צעטיל — a small slip of paper with a prayer request, placed at the grave or read there] there — and afterward burn it, for the sake of Heaven.