קצג

Overview: Sunday, Parshas Pinchas — the Sunday after the wedding. Yitzchok has left. The joy did not linger long — only about two hours — but everyone was very joyful. Yitzchok's longing after the joy is very good — *hisga'agu'im* — longing — is itself a great spiritual quality. Even now in his place he should rejoice — *ki lo davar reik kol mah she'over aleinu b'chasday Hashem.* The small joy in Breslov is a great wonder given all that passes over them. Reb Nussun sees with his own eyes: *chasday Hashem lo samnu* — there is still hope for complete joy — *simchas mitzvah* — the true joy of Israel. A remarkable Yiddish passage of defiant hope — the word *hoff* (hope) said seven times — closing with *sason v'simchah yassigu.*

I will inform you — my beloved son — a little of what passed over me since Wednesday of Parshas Pinchas that has passed.

My beloved son — my dear one.

I received your letter — and there is nothing to inform you. After your departure the joy did not linger a long time — only about two hours — and praised be G-d everyone was very joyful. And the fact that you long after the joy — this is very good [מַה שֶּׁאַתָּה מִתְגַּעְגֵּעַ אַחַר הַשִּׂמְחָה זֶה טוֹב מְאֹד — the *hisga'agu'im* — the longing — is itself a spiritual quality. The person who longs for holy joy after the gathering is one whose soul has been touched by it and wishes to return. Reb Nussun affirms this longing as a great *zechus*] — and even now — wherever you are — rejoice and be glad in His salvation. For nothing is empty of what passes over us — in the kindnesses of Hashem and His immense wonders [כִּי לֹא דָּבָר רֵיק הוּא — Devarim 32:47: "for it is not an empty thing from you." Every experience — even the ordinary — carries the divine kindness and wonders within it for those who have eyes to see] [Devarim 32:47] . And the small joy that we merited now in Breslov is a great wonder for whoever pays attention to all that passes over us in these days. And behold — I see with my own eyes that the kindnesses of Hashem have not ended [Eichah 3:22] — there is still hope that we will merit complete joy — the joy of a *mitzvah* — the true joy of Israel — in this world and the next forever.

And I was compelled to pledge security and borrow approximately nine rubles of silver — and I immediately spent seven rubles of silver to sweeten somewhat the above-mentioned matter — and the remainder was for the travel expenses. Meanwhile the above-mentioned Rabbi Shmuel examined my *bilet* [בִּילֶעט — the travel permit: a document required by Russian law permitting Jews to travel and reside outside their registered community. Without a valid *bilet* a Jew was subject to arrest and expulsion] — and its time had already expired. And my heart was very very divided — how to conduct myself. Meanwhile a messenger came and brought me your letter — and I replied to you briefly that tomorrow at dawn I would set out on my way — for that was my mind then — to travel to the holy community of Nemirov and to linger there or on the way until the *bilet* would reach me.

But many are the thoughts in a man's heart — and the counsel of Hashem — it is she who will stand [Mishlai 19:21] — and Hashem Yisborach arranged it that I was delayed here until today. And today my brother Rabbi Yudl brought me a *zashnvideshni* [זַאשְׁוִודֶעשְׁנִי — a Russian-Ukrainian word for a type of official permit or certificate — here a travel permit sealed by the community] sealed with the seal of the community — but the seal of the *parnas* had not yet been obtained — for he was asleep when he left his home.

And I was compelled to send Rabbi Nachman of Tulchin on foot to Nemirov for this — and also on Thursday he went to Nemirov for this. And yesterday — before *minchah* — the officer [הַקְּוַוארְטַאלְנֶע — the *kvartalnye*: the Russian neighborhood officer or investigator — a local police official responsible for surveillance of a quarter of a town] came to my home — and asked about the matter of the printing press. And they answered him: has he not already been without this press for many years? And he left my home in silence and did not reply a word. And also he did not go up to my upper floor at all — he was only on my ground floor. And as it appears — there is no fear — with the help of Hashem Yisborach. And now I am waiting for the *bilet* and will seek to travel — if Hashem wills it. And behold — I had wished to extend a little — but meanwhile some preoccupations surrounded me. And behold — my son — from yourself you will understand how everything is one — what happens by you and here and in Uman and so forth — and all that happens in the entire world — all is bound and linked together [הַכֹּל אָדוּק וּמְקֻשָּׁר זֶה בָּזֶה — one of Reb Nussun's recurring meditations: the interconnectedness of all events — nothing is random, nothing is isolated. All that happens in Breslov and Uman and Tulchin and the world is bound into a single divine tapestry] — and His wonders and His thoughts — Yisborach — are very very deep. Although many distresses surround us and they pursue us from every side — even so — this itself is our consolation in our affliction — for since each one sees that such abysses pass over him at every time — *tehom el tehom kore* — deep calls to deep [תְּהוֹם אֶל תְּהוֹם קוֹרֵא — Tehillim 42:8: "deep calls to deep at the voice of Your waterfalls." Applied here

: wave after wave of crisis — each depth calling out to another depth — and yet Hashem's salvation runs through them all] [Tehillim 42:8] and so forth — how great are the kindnesses of Hashem that saved us from being pursuers of the wholesome and upright ones who flee and escape at every time to Hashem Yisborach and to His Torah and to the true *tzaddikim* — every day we must rejoice greatly in this. How fortunate are we that we are from the pursued and not from the pursuers. And also the wicked Mordechai Shrerer [מָרְדְּכַי שֶׁערֶער — a known opponent and troublemaker — associated with the forces of the *machloket* — here named with the epithet *harasha* — the wicked one. He has raised his hand to strike a worthy and righteous person] — may his name be blotted — has certainly already sunk in the mire of the depths of the desires of this world.

And not content with all of this — he has added further to kindle upon himself a fire not blown — to raise his hand to strike a worthy and righteous man who stands against him. Woe to him — woe to his soul — woe and alas to all who attach themselves to him. In truth — if Rabbi Itzik were a person of strong mind — he could have uprooted him had he given a written complaint against him — for the world is not abandoned. And if it is very hard to endure their insults and humiliations and gnashing of teeth — what can be done? Everything is for good — for our sins have brought these upon us — and we are obligated to accept everything as atonement for sin and forgiveness of transgression — for certainly we are not worthy to draw close to such light — and therefore we are obligated to endure all of this.

[Hebrew: נָתָן מִבְּרֶסְלֶב...]

The words of your father — who longs for joy with all his heart — for the essential is the joy. [אוּן טַאקִי פָארְט הָאפּ אוּן טַאקִי פָארְט אוּן פָארְט אוּן פָארְט הָאפּ אוּן טַאקִי הָאפּ וָואס הָאפּ הֵייסְט לוּשְׁמִיר וִויא אַזוֹי סְ'אִיז הַאבִּי הָאפּ — Breslov Yiddish: "And yet — despite all — I have hope. And truly I still have — and still and still I have hope — and truly I have hope — and what does hope mean? Let us see — however things are — I have hope." A remarkable outburst of Reb Nussun's signature defiant hope in Yiddish — the word hoff (hope) repeated seven times in seven different forms — a kind of incantation against despair] Joy and gladness shall overtake [Yeshayahu 35:10] and so forth. Nussun of Breslov. And certainly He will do in His mercies with us a sign for good — and our enemies will see and be ashamed. And behold — in the midst of the above-mentioned sufferings — my livelihood is also very tight — and added to this I was compelled to borrow for the above — and also I need to cover all the needs of my son's wedding — may he live. And on last Friday my mind was greatly preoccupied with this — meanwhile Hashem Yisborach expanded for me — for there arrived a letter from Rabbi Ze'ev from Vinnitze — and he sent me ten rubles of silver. Although it is a very small sum — even so I saw in this the wonders of Hashem — for the kindnesses of Hashem have not ended — and in distress You gave me expansiveness [Eichah 3:22; Tehillim 4:2] — and I hoped to Him — Yisborach — that He would help me and all of us and save us in all that we need to be saved — in body and in soul and in money — in the physical and in the spiritual. Be strong and resolute — my son — and see and understand well how a person is pursued at every time — especially one who wishes to approach holiness. And we have nothing except for the few good points that we snatch every day through crying out and prayer and study and will and longing and good yearnings — and through some *mitzvah* that one merits to perform — *tzedakah* and acts of kindness. And a person has only that day [אֵין לְאָדָם אֶלָּא אוֹתוֹ הַיּוֹם — "a person has nothing except that day." A distillation of the urgency of *hayom* — today — from Tehillim 95:7: *hayom im b'kolo tishme'u* — the teaching that the entire work of the soul must happen now — this day — not tomorrow] — as is written on the verse: today if you hear His voice [Tehillim 95:7] — and do not say: when I am free I will study — and so forth. And especially since we already know that the will itself is very good and the essential is the will. And behold — there is no free time to extend further — and I intend to write you another letter before my departure from here. And may the Master of Mercy have mercy upon us that we merit from now on to bring each other good tidings.